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Metaphor time: "I want my guitar to sound like..."


Barnabyhuggins

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Posted

Let's get poetic:

 

I want my guitar to sound like you've just been kicked in the chest by a 400 lbs bouncer. While you are on the ground with your head spinning and not sure of precisely what happened ten of the most beautiful women in world rub their naked bodies all over you.

 

Or

 

I want my lead tones to sound like the screams of Marin Timmy getting flayed alive by Balthazar the Thorn-Cocked DemonSpawn.

 

Others?

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Posted

I want my guitar to sound like a space ray.

 

or

 

I want my guitar to sound like a cheesy laser beam sound effect.

 

 

 

 

 

I've been having trouble nailing those speicific tones, though.

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Posted

 

Originally posted by papa taco

I want my crunchy rythm guitar riffs to sound like a thousand peasant children flatulating at once.

 

 

 

 

 

rhythm pickup+bugmuff+envelope filter?

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Posted

.

 

I want my guitar to sound like this really hot babysitter just walked in on you as you're masturbating your dog, but then starts to suck the dog off, while simultaneously moving your fist up her puckered asshole all the way to where your new diver's watch is starting to make her anus bleed to where the dog leans over and begins licking the blood off, before 8 lost supermodels who are looking for their coke dealer stumble in, see a bloody anus, figure it's a new photo shoot and begin undressing themselves in front you, while licking each others hardened nipples while you take pictures with your free hand.

Then the dog finally cums, you lose your diver's watch, the supermodels snort the dog cum off of the floor because they're so high off of the hormones and sexual hubris, they think it's coke, all the while yelling out the name of this new night club act you've just invented.

 

Basically, i want my guitar to sound like "The Aristocrats."

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Posted

i want my guitar sound like i'm scratching on a turntable whereas i'm really playing a guitar cuz i'm really clever like that.

 

oh. wait, no that's tom morello...

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Posted

Originally posted by Elliott Damage



but my clean sound should be like a pack of sea angels lifting them to sailor heaven.
:thu:

 

 

 

HALLELUJAH!

HALLELUJAH!

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Posted

Interesting. Velvet sprang immediately to mind here too, but maybe a smartly tailored velvet suit jacket. Luscious soft but exquisitely well defined at the same time...

 

Michael

 

 

Originally posted by amanonfire

my guitar sounds like...


a boeing 757 made out of velvet crashing into an eiffel tower constructed completely of lightbulbs.

 

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Posted
Originally posted by mischultz

Interesting. Velvet sprang immediately to mind here too, but maybe a smartly tailored velvet suit jacket. Luscious soft but exquisitely well defined at the same time...


Michael


yeah, baby!

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