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I recently decided that I'm not using seatbelts anymore.


Dr.Picklebottom

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a few days ago i was driving to my mailbox and from past experiences i knew it was likely to be a short ride so i decided to throw caution to the wind and go commando. thats right. no belt. for realsies.

 

it was incredible! i felt like i just woke up from a coma caused by awesomeness. i knew there was no turning back. i was a new man defined by his risk and carelessness.

 

i know what youre all thinking- but Cornelius, what about small minded enforcers of silly helpful laws?

 

way ahead of you, deep thinker.

 

there is a jeep parked around the corner from my house thats been there for months. either its been abandoned or the owner lives in the house its parked in front of. doesnt matter. i cut a plastic window and helped myself to a seatbelt- from the drivers side. i figured id push (force) the owner to make the same decision i had.

 

i now have a false seatbelt rigged up in my car with velcro to appear that im protected from serious bodily harm resulting from any deadly high speed collisions. but i assure you, nothing could be further from the truth.;)

 

oh, and i bought a micro pog this morning.:)

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I have a friend who's a doctor in a NYC hospital ER. He told me that on friday and Saturday nights, back before seat belts became the big fad, it was typical for people to be brought in with their faces ripped away and tucked up under their scalps. He would carefully unravel the face and and try to place what's left of it over the front of the head before the plastic surgeon got involved. Apparently that's what typically happens when a face hits a windshield head on. It's enough to keep me wearing my seat belt, even when I'm driving to the store that's two blocks away.

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majpilot_wideweb__470x282,0.jpg

 

Ani Martinez

September 23, 2007

 

IT WAS like a scene out of a movie. A small cargo plane, flying over a busy highway, began losing steam and doing cartwheels in the sky over Florida.

 

Then it struck a warehouse, clipping its right wing, and crashed into a grassy swale on the side of the road

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