Members LowPhreak Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Good luck, TU BE. You're going to need it with the new asshole you'll get ripped in Fam. Court. Here's the way it is: you can hire a lawyer and he/she will make you think they're out to help you, and promise in court they'll get you this, that, and the other. The FACT is however that they're out to extract maximum profit from your grieving, emotionally distraught carcass. They'll do the same to your wife but at least she'll probably have the kids in the end to show for it. The court, the law guardians, the therapists, child psychologists, etc. are all along for the ride because after all, it's their livelihood too and they don't want peeps actually working out their differences in a timely & fair manner. The family courts would have only maybe 1/3 the caseloads they have now if we all did that, and lots of these parasites might not have jobs very long. The unfortunate stats are that in about 93% of cases the mother ends up with full or controlling custody of the kids. You have to be just about an axe murderer as a mother to lose the kids. And getting joint or shared custody means the mom has to want to - and most of them don't once they discover they can shove it up your ass and break it off. There's a slight chance that you'd get a judge that isn't a self-important, sadistic Nazi. Good luck with that too. It's a big money-making industry, just like locking peeps up for years over a few joints or rocks or DWI. It's got very little to do with "what's best for the kids", because the system doesn't give a goddamn about YOUR kids - they're just another snot-nosed offspring of the hoi polloi and you're not members of The Big Club - so here's a hearty "{censored} You" coz it ain't THEIR kids. Unless it's going to somehow make them some money then they'll drag it out for as long as possible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members insurrection Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 I'm actually active duty Air Force right now. Been looking at divorcing my wife for a while. Either way, I am pretty confident that my best case scenario is 49% custody, unfortunately. See, TOOB. Unfortunately for our friend here... the scale is tipped greatly in your favor.Aran, sorry to hear about it bro. I'd probably flip out bad over my kids. Real bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members willy22 Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Sounds like she is thinking 100% about herself and no one else. Kids included. She doesn't have the right to keep them away from their father. If she has any heart at all she'll see that she must compromise.Hope things work out for you brother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members filthy6 Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Oh, and Guiness is what every dip{censored} loser e-brags about drinking to make himself look cool. Way to sport the poser look, just like with your Valvestate Marshall. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members wisewendell Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 That's a rightous mohawk! Sorry I couldnt make it to the ampfest...I was in austin the same day but we had to go to fry's and..my parents took me to GC(riding with your parents..somewhat sucks sometimes) Thank the good Lord I have both my parents, and I have friends who's parents went through divorces, and most of their marrieges have ended in divorce...sucks when peeps is selfish, Imma pray for ya! cause with such a righteous hairdo your little man has, it'd be a dang shame to break yall up!!! (pastors son at our church who is 6...decided he's gonna have a mohawk just like me...so proud of him)Plus...it's texas...too bad she doesnt get shot for trying to steal the neighbours water hose Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Keebz Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Well, I just talked to one of my best friends who is in the Navy. His advice was to let her join. He said to even NOT get a divorce. The AF is deploying EVERYBODY who is new to Iraq right now he told me. The government would be paying me for living expenses while she is there. But if I do get the divorce, no judge in his right mind is gonna make the kids travel the country when they could have a STEADY home, school, friends etc...This is similar to what I was going to say after reading your initial post. But...she could try to pull some dirt on you to win custody. Careful what you post on the internet bro, those could be used against you...especially that myspace {censored}.I'm speaking from experience in what happened in my divorce.My Ex got our daughter and lives in NM, while I have my life in AZ.Last time I saw my oldest daughter was at July 4th holiday...it really sucks because she's only 7 years old and I've already been without her for 3 years. I see her about 3-4 times a year and she cries for me every {censored}in' time I have to say Goodbye to her.Some of the stuff you post makes me feel for you bro...I've been there.Good luck to you, and much mojo sent! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Holy War Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 how old is she? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HKSblade1 Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 If you can provide for your children and have a stable job, kids have family and friends no judge will force children to travel the country every 3 ys with an AF Mom. This should be a no brainer custody win for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LowPhreak Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Sounds like she is thinking 100% about herself and no one else. Kids included. She doesn't have the right to keep them away from their father. If she has any heart at all she'll see that she must compromise. I'll tell you something else too: most mothers at this point don't care about how much it hurts the kids either. They're sure to have people around them that will somehow justify what they're doing, and will be told that "hey, lots of kids grow up without Dads. They'll be OK." To mothers in this state of mind it becomes a mixture of revenge/getting their rocks off from effing up a guy's life, and the fact that they really believe keeping the kids away from this "awful man" is best for them. In the courts, if a judge starts meting out too much fairness to the fathers, they'll soon have a horde of women's rights groups breathing down their necks (like the National Organization of Women) who have vastly more political pull than do the very few, small men's groups to advocate for us. So a lot of judges are scared off even if they aren't self-serving assholes to begin with. It's not about fairness, justice, or how it impacts a kid's childhood in the long run. It's about money & power, ie politics, because "politics" = "who gets what". Believe me, I've been through this whole wringer so I know from what I speak. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members JBecker Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Most joint custody decisions involve a certain radius in which the parent must live within or they forfeit their right to No judge in their right mind is going to put them with the mother if it means denying them a relationship with their father and placing them in a home where they would be perpetually uprooted and potentially without a mother for long periods of time, certainly not if you have a good lawyer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LowPhreak Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 If you can provide for your children and have a stable job, kids have family and friends no judge will force children to travel the country every 3 ys with an AF Mom. This should be a no brainer custody win for you. Don't let yourself be fooled. That's exactly what a lawyer will want you to believe, to get you to spend the money to keep the fight going. The harsh reality is that in family court in most states, judges have a very wide latitude to do or allow almost anything they want. Very little is mandatory law that the judge actually has to strictly follow. I know of many cases where the father had a job and was stable, and the mother moved away just to make it nearly impossible for the father to have his parenting time, and the mother's got away with it totally scott-free. Some of those fathers moved to where the mother was and still the mothers got away with all kinds of violations of the court orders. It can go on for years and years. TU BE just better hope he comes across a decent judge. Hey, I don't like being all 'gloom & doom' and pissing on someone's Cheerios, but I'm just clueing him on what he's in for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members killertone Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Hey Jason, sorry to hear of your troubles. Congrats though on your kickass ability to be a Dad. That rules that your kids are #1 for you. Mine are, too. I hope everything works out best for you, bro. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members potaetoes Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 don't worry. she can't take the kids to iraq. hard for her to get custody if she's going to be facing likely deployment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ThrashmetalErik Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 man what a {censored}ing bitch. Doesn't she see the position you're in? they dont now, and apparently not at tudes age either. Forgive me for being cynical, mojo sent Im sorry, I cant imagine how {censored}ty that feals, talk to her about it, if she's anything short of a decent parent she'll work it out so that you can still see your kid without him flying out to see you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LowPhreak Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 ...talk to her about it, if she's anything short of a decent parent she'll work it out so that you can still see your kid without him flying out to see you.A very naive way to look at it. You're depending on the decency and grace of a woman that (in all likelihood) at some point will want to "move on with her life" and take her kids with her -- which doesn't include the father's OR the kid's feelings. I'm telling you, when women get this {censored} in their heads that's it. I know that sounds sexist but you know what? It's the truth so I don't care what it sounds like. It is what it is. To a lot of women, all you are is a sperm donor and a paycheck. Your "feelings" and what you want from life they couldn't care less about. All they need to do is offer up some {censored} and they'll generally get what they want from dumb assed men. Once they have the kids, they can always find another guy for a paycheck and that new guy won't have any say over those kids at all. So she gets the love & companionship of her kids, a pretty good living, control of the situation, AND sex. And you get what -- a piece of ass every few nights, and the minute you're not throwing in the bucks you're out on your ear? Sure, not all women are like that, but the vast majority are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members loiking Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Aw. Did someone's mommy not pack him a Jello pudding in his lunchbox today?? It's okay dude. I know how it feels, when you're a kid, and you're watching all the other kids pull cookies, cupcakes, and candy out of their lunchboxes, and then you look in yours and all you got is a cheese sandwich, a carrot, a water bottle, and your pokemon cards. If I was you, I woulda traded my cards for someones dessert. Maybe mommy will give you DOUBLE DESSERTS tomorrow I don't think your mommy should be letting you drink beer, little guy. Patronisation will only get you thrown in the n00b bin. Funny thing is patronisation only works of all or part of what you were saying is true. My mother and i have not been on speaking terms for 3 years, so the chance of her packing me a lunch is rather small, don't you reckon? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Volitan Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Patronisation will only get you thrown in the n00b bin. Funny thing is patronisation only works of all or part of what you were saying is true. My mother and i have not been on speaking terms for 3 years, so the chance of her packing me a lunch is rather small, don't you reckon?I wouldn't love you if I was your mother either Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Ron Burgandy Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Patronisation will only get you thrown in the n00b bin. Funny thing is patronisation only works of all or part of what you were saying is true. My mother and i have not been on speaking terms for 3 years, so the chance of her packing me a lunch is rather small, don't you reckon?That doesn't even make sense. Your Mom is in the next room telling you to wash up for dinner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Dave Owens Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 dude..lets see if she can actually pull it off..i dont know your wife..but there are alot of hurdlesthat she has to over come..and she's not just packingthe kids into a suitcase and taking them thru basic training.she may fall flat on her ass...its not as easy as it looks..if she wanted to drive a tractor trailer,she might have better luck doing what she wants to..also she cant takethe kids over seas as a single parent either.i had an X whosister did some of this kind of thing..and they draggedthere kids to Germany.( which lasted two years.)...but both parents had to go..maybe help her get thru thething and she gets sent over there..you get the kids...dont sweat it..and just make her life as misrable as you can..btw..."loiking"....eat {censored} and die... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members killertone Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 Patronisation will only get you thrown in the n00b bin. Funny thing is patronisation only works of all or part of what you were saying is true. My mother and i have not been on speaking terms for 3 years, so the chance of her packing me a lunch is rather small, don't you reckon?How can you type so much with a Wallaby cock in your mouth? You must have talent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members loiking Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^I find all of the above quite insulting, the last one ignorant and rascist. Wallabys tend not to come to a city with a population of 5 million. Funny bout that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Dave Owens Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 if you find this insulting..then you havent been here longenough..this is nothing.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members loiking Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 spose, its not that insulting. The jibe about my mother, who was a Heroin addict and is probably dead was a bit hurtful. The Wallaby one is pretty hilarious but. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members K.platyops Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 You want to avoid the court, if at all possible. Because then, you get into a big {censored}ing system, with hundreds and hundreds of cases. Judges do have a lot of leeway, but by nature, it's a conservative and not progressive environment at times. It can be much easier for them to follow tradition and go with mother's custody. Thankfully, the totally one-siding siding with mothers getting custody is waning. Lawyers are tough. I often think you can get the best treatment if you can get a reference to a lawyer from a friend. If you know any lawyers personally, or have had a good interraction with a lawyer who specializes in another field, maybe try getting a recommendation or two from them. You can even try your accountant for a few leads. It can also help to get a lawyer who is familiar with the courts and the staff where you'll be going to file papers and go to hearings. I don't know the situation really, but I'm wondering whether your wife is going to stick with the idea of joining the military...especially if down the road in the near future she gets wind that her move might jeapordize her chances at custody, rather than enhancing it.By the way, really sorry to hear your plight here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Volitan Posted November 7, 2007 Members Share Posted November 7, 2007 The jibe about my mother, who was a Heroin addict and is probably dead was a bit hurtful. You earned it Ignored Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.