Jump to content

New Song - Candyland


rsadasiv

Recommended Posts

  • Members

Candyland - on Soundclick and MySpace. Mixed on headphones, so use em if you've got em.

 

Probably needs a new vocal and a better mix, but let me know what you think. The plot is lifted from "Babylon Revisited" by F. Scott Fitzgerald.

 

 

Butt-crack of dawn

The dog comes along

Four Runner guns, headlights turn on

And then we're gone

 

Path through the trees

Then rocks and the beach

Waves roll in below a secant of sun.

 

Just me and my board

The wind's from the north

And my troubles are left behind on the shore.

 

Back in Candyland.

 

Beds are all made

The toys are displayed

Refrigerator is stocked, back door is locked

And I'm on my way

 

Drive 95

Down Old Route 1

Day's just begun but I've been working towards this for months.

 

Just me and my boys

We'll make plenty of noise

And we'll pick up right back

Where we had to leave off before

 

Back in Candyland.

 

Hearing

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

The mix is lacking distinction between any of the individual parts...like its a bit muddled. I would have liked to hear the vocals a bit clearer, especially since the lyrics seem to be such a important part of the song.

 

I loved the spoken word part ("D...."). The instrumental bit at the very end was very cool as well.

 

I listened to "Daffodils in the Snow" too (first thing that played when I hit your myspace page). I loved the vibe. Bassline in the beginning was killer. That is definetly something that would end up on my itunes playlist.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

The drum machine is really coming along for you. This one was almost too out there for me, and that's saying a lot. I love off-kilter, but this one really limps in some places. Same with the guitar at the intro.

 

I agree with BC's diagnosis re: the mix, but I'm not sure that's a bad thing. It sounds like a big, sticky mess. The semi-electric piano sound (I think there's only one piano sound in there) is great, and the part throughout is awesome.

 

Outro kicks ass. Perfect.

 

OK-that was my type-as-I-listen bit. It's done playing now. I think you could always take an ingredient out at any time to open the mix up a little bit, and the song would not suffer. I also did not pick out the chorus/tag line unless I was following along with the lyrics. That needs a little sparkle on it. Vocals need a little boost, and maybe some enunciation, to draw the listener into the lyrics.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Overall this gives me a weird unsettled feeling despite the fact that the whole song is basically a 'up'-feeling major key groove. The vocals are unconventional (at least to me) and are kind of all over the place. The first time I listened I felt that the whole thing would fall apart into chaos at any moment...on second listen it held together better. A lot of my initial perception comes from the vocal, which is a bit rhythmically wayward. I love the overall groove. That end section is indeed fabulous...the whirring synth is unexpected and a wonderful payoff, like suddenly the song can fly.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

This is pretty much it on new material for now. If you want to know what I think, it's on my blog. Thanks for all the constructive criticism (many of your comments have been incorporated into my list) and hopefully I will be able to start re-recording (and posting songs) in the fall.

 

Cheers.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I think going song-by-song is a good approach. I think starting w/ drums, then doing bass, then vocals, then anything else is a good way to have a firm, funky foundation with a strong vocal performance, and then no more of the other stuff than is necessary. I think I heard that from the guy who fronts Cake, but a good idea is a good idea.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...