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new song - 'Versailles'


rcb

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Holy crap, it's been a while...just starting to feel like I'm getting back into the swing of it. Anyway, here's a somewhat new one:

 

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/songInfo.cfm?bandID=595643&songID=5307114

 

This is actually meant to be a much heavier Pumpkins-like tune, but I haven't yet had the time to record that version. I'm pretty happy with what came out, though (despite some scratchiness in the ebow tracks that I need to get rid of).

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I like the song a lot. I'm not sure I like the electric guitar. Maybe I do. I surely do sometimes, but occasionally I thought it was beginning to get a tad bothersome. But the song itself is just perfect.

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Ryan shared this song with me in email a month or so ago. Great work again from him. Nothing much I can add from what I've already told him.

 

Great ebow, great song, great musicianship.... Love it! :)

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what a great acoustic sound...i love that ebow..i don't use it enough. i'm going to bust it out after this listen. :)

 

i like how dry your voice sits in teh mix....nice and intimate. as far as the song is concerned, i dig the chorus, but i don't hear anything as 'marketable' as a pumpkins chorus, but who cares? it's good. :) ...and what the hell do i know about 'marketability' anyway? lol.

 

this is a good work, man. really.

"so quiet...we thought the smoke would give us away..." i like that.

 

good to see you again, man. keep postin!

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what a great acoustic sound...i love that ebow..i don't use it enough. i'm going to bust it out after this listen.
:)

i like how dry your voice sits in teh mix....nice and intimate. as far as the song is concerned, i dig the chorus, but i don't hear anything as 'marketable' as a pumpkins chorus, but who cares? it's good.
:)
...and what the hell do i know about 'marketability' anyway? lol.


this is a good work, man. really.

"so quiet...we thought the smoke would give us away..." i like that.


good to see you again, man. keep postin!

 

+1

 

Hey rcb, I dig this song. I have absolutely no comments about the production - this one sounds great as it is.

 

I think the "non-marketability" of the chorus is a result of all those open chords and the bass drone. Pumpkins choruses are big major chord events - alternate/open chord voicings are pretty much confined to the verse, and in the chorus the bass moves hard into the tonic, usually a little early, followed by a drum roll/cymbal crash.

 

"In spite" "of my rage" "I am still" "just a rat" "in a cage"

 

Lyrically, I have the same issues with "Versailles" that I had with the "Drive All Night" song - for me to be invested in the characters they have to inhabit a consistent universe, so when you can see tiny lights in space through a cool BRIGHT atmosphere it makes me care about the characters that much less. The timeline as a whole makes more sense, but I don't understand how they get from the balcony to the fences and back again - through the whole rest of the song they are sitting around, talking, observing celestial bodies and gazing into each other's eyes, so it seems a little out of character for them to spend the second half of the first verse running around, jumping over fences and being "brave".

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Wow.

Great song.

I especially liked how you organized the lyrics using the same verb twice in the verses (i.e.

 

lying on the concrete

gazing at the tiny lights in space

gazing at each other

loving all the colors in your face

loving every second

soaking in the cool bright atmosphere

soaking in the technicolor

movie set we seem to be in

)

 

The chorus is the only thing that I believe is weak.

It really doesn't make me listen to the whole song. It doesn't really stay with me, it doesn't make me want to sing it. Other than that, the ebow sound gives a quite cool atmospheric vibe and I love it.

 

Great song!!!

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The chorus is definitely where it's at for me in this song. It's interesting that a couple people said that it was the weakest part of the song. It immediately grabbed my attention when I listened to it. On the other hand, the verse just drags and feels a little plain to me. The melody just doesn't grab me in any way. It's almost like talking and the lyrics don't make it interesting enough IMO. I also like the e-bow sounds that you got. I have a e-bow too but you've gotten better sounds in this song than I usually can get when I use it. There might have been a pitch issue on the part coming out of the second chorus but nobody else seems to think that so my ears are probably just a little off. "Soaking in the technicolor" was my favorite lyric. Once again, I really thought the chorus brought a lot of good energy to the song it just kind of lost it for me when it went back to the verse. Overall I like the song so take that for whatever you think it's worth along with the rest of my post.

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Thanks for the comments, guys! :)

 

Interesting story about the ebow...this is the first time I've recorded with one, and I haven't used it much prior to this song. It can be difficult to control - especially while using a slide like I did - so I gave it three passes. I was about to record another take, when I thought, "Hmmm...I wonder what all those takes sound like on top of each other?" And there ya go. I panned 60 L, 60 R, and one in the middle somewhere; it works well since I was playing nearly the same lines on each take. Gives it the perfect amount of spaciness I was looking for.

 

And to clear something up - I'm not trying to mimic the Pumpkins style, but it does feel like this one is subconsciously drawing some influence from a Corgan tune.

 

Lyrically...I guess the best way to describe it is an inside 'story' (for lack of a better term) open for intrepretation. With this song, I'm not concerned with whether or not the listener understands exactly what's going on; it's meant to be a bit psychadelic and ambiguous - thus the contrasting imagery. The song does follow a general timeline, but what suggests that they got back to the balcony? ;)

 

"so quiet...we thought the smoke would give us away..." i like that.

 

Thanks...that's my favorite line - the one that really defines the whole song for me.

 

What do you guys think about the sound that comes in right at the start of the third verse - "Talking as the sun comes up"? I like it since it creates a needed accent at that point, but I also dislike it because it's a sound that hasn't been heard before, and is not heard again (a behind the nut scrape with some reverse reverb added).

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I like this song. I like the ebo, although, I would cut it way down in the mix, almost to the point where you can barely hear it in the backround. It draws away from the vocals when it's played over the top of them. It's hard to know what to focus on. And as it stands now, when it's not in the backround in certain places, there seems to be something missing. Maybe you could put some other space-filling type of thing behind the song when the ebo's not present, like low keyboard chords held out, or something. Or, perhaps, add the ebo back in ever so subtly, almost inaudibly as the verse starts, then build it to where you've used it at the end of the chorus.

 

Nice lyrics! Overall, good job!

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Regarding the ebow...I don't agree that it should be nearly inaudible, but I could probably stand to check it in places, making sure that it doesn't get in the way of the vocals.

 

 

And as it stands now, when it's not in the backround in certain places, there seems to be something missing. Maybe you could put some other space-filling type of thing behind the song when the ebo's not present, like low keyboard chords held out, or something.

 

 

I happen to like the 'nakedness' of the mix, but it's something to consider.

 

Thanks for your comments!

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Wow thats an excellent tune. I like your acoustic guitar playing. The attack patterns and strumming keep the song moving and are interesting. Your vocals sound very nice to, I wish I could sound that comfortable on the mic,:freak:

 

Great job.

 

side note, I'm not hearing ANY Corgan on the vox or in the lyrics, but I can hear it in the playing and especially the manner/use of the ebow in that fashion.

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Thanks!

 

side note, I'm not hearing ANY Corgan on the vox or in the lyrics, but I can hear it in the playing and especially the manner/use of the ebow in that fashion.

 

Yeah, I'm glad that you don't here any Corgan in my singing. :) I love SP, but Billy doesn't really have what you'd call a great voice.

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Very nice!Very profesional.I really liked the acoustic here.Are you using your Martin DX1?If so wowie...I liked the effect---only peave I may have---is that it may need something extra during later sections with no singing.Not too sure tho---this is excellent.

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Thanks a lot, man - and yes, that is the DX1 you're hearing. I don't care that it's a lower line Martin...I think it sounds terrific, even better than some of the slightly higher priced models. It has a rich, dark sound with a very nice bass and midrange, and lacks that jangly aspect that I hate in a lot of acoustics. My only gripe with it is that it's a tad quiet, but it's usually not an issue.

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