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Ode to a Riotgrrll


TravvyBear

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So, I was hanging out with this girl until like, 1ish in the morning (Because I'm about to graduate and I can do mature things like hang out late now :rolleyes: ) anyways, we had a really fun night and she jokingly suggested I write a song about it, so I did.

 

www.soundclick.com/reverb728

 

There is a rough demo there if anyone wants to check it out, it needs to be revised a bit, so I'm open to suggestions.

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That's a nice little ditty. Cute, disarmingly so. Unpretentious. I really have no recommendations. It's not a "major song of massive import." It's a ditty. I like it. It's innocent without being barftasticly twee.

 

 

Thanks. And yeah, you're right, I wasn't trying to write a ground breaker, just a story. I'm glad you liked it.

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Nice. Way better than I was expecting. I like your sad off-kilter voice too. I'd say you are surely on your way toward spending many more night lates with this young lady...

 

One critique - and this generally applies to most songs young guys write about young girls they dig (myself included when I was still young): tell us about this girl. Cause right now it's all about you, although you're singing an "Ode to Riot GRRL." You want to see her soon. Great. You had a fun night watching Audrey Hepburn (best line, BTW). But tell me SOMETHING about her. Doesn't have to be much - but least one thing. Anything. Her funny haircut. Torn Jeans. Something she did that night. Shared a cigarette? Hell it didn't even have to happen to be true. Doesn't matter. Something anything observant about WHY you would want to see this girl soon other than because you want to, you know?

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Nice. Way better than I was expecting. I like your sad off-kilter voice too. I'd say you are surely on your way toward spending many more night lates with this young lady...


One critique - and this generally applies to most songs young guys write about young girls they dig (myself included when I was still young): tell us about this girl. Cause right now it's all about you, although you're singing an "Ode to Riot GRRL." You want to see her soon. Great. You had a fun night watching Audrey Hepburn (best line, BTW). But tell me SOMETHING about her. Doesn't have to be much - but least one thing. Anything. Her funny haircut. Torn Jeans. Something she did that night. Shared a cigarette? Hell it didn't even have to happen to be true. Doesn't matter. Something anything observant about WHY you would want to see this girl soon other than because you want to, you know?

 

 

Yeah, that makes sense! Thanks man, I will defiantly take that into account.

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