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Destiny's Deal


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It's another grey day here on the East Coast.....and I have been truly under the weather. Seemed like a good time to get this song off my chest.

 

Destiny's Deal

 

In grey fields

I have roamed

Through cold steel

And hard stone

 

I have known

'Cause I've seen the signs

That the seeds I've sown

Will grow fine....over time.

 

But how long have I been waiting

How long

And how long will I be waiting

 

I waiting for destiny's deal

to get me home

I'm waiting for destiny's deal

I am waiting

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Like this piece. Very mellow and subtly attractive. This is a perfect song for listening to overlooking some beautiful beach or nature scene. It would also work perfectly for a film montage esp. one with loads of dramatic underscore. Great stuff man, really enjoyed it!

 

I would throw this one into a music library and see if you could land some royalties. I'm pretty sure there is someone out there who could use this tune for their film.:thu:

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Songwriting, at least the way I go about it, is a study in evolution.

 

You get an idea and run with it. Good or bad, you stick with it and see where it takes you. A lot get tossed along the way.....few make it.

 

This tune has been a challenge. Been grinding on it all day trying to get the vox to fit, trying to tune the guit tracks....just basically sticking with it like a wayward child.

 

I love all of my children.;)

 

Happy Father's Day to all of you Dads.

 

Remix.........

 

Destiny's Deal

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I've always found it remarkable that someone can put together a song and the music doesn't follow the melody of the lyrics but the overall feeling comes though

cool song

 

 

Thanks......I think;)

 

Seriously, though, I sat in my most comfortable chair early this morning and gave this one another close listen and I get what you are saying. I wish I could say I was clever enough to be that........clever, but........

 

There are some who can craft excellent songs (kudos to Beakybird and many others) and there are some, like myself, who take what comes along and do their best to capture it.

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Music is very good. Really great title. Really great concept.

Good refrain.

 

First seven lines are good. I think the lyrics should be

as good as the music, concept and the title.

 

V.S. Naipaul once advised a writing student to pay attention

to the shape of the lines. How do they appear visually?

 

It starts really well. I think it starts to fizzle at about

"will grow fine". That's just my opinion.

 

But "as is", it's a finished production, if you didn't change anything.

It's a lot better than most stuff I hear.

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I've always found it remarkable that someone can put together a song and the music doesn't follow the melody of the lyrics but the overall feeling comes though

cool song

 

 

if I'm understanding this correctly, I think he's saying that most people do have a lyrical/ melody that seem to go hand in hand and this song doesn't ( course that goes without saying once you listen to it) but it works out fine.

 

I'm one of those as well that find it hard to express the lyrics without the melody following along. I have to almost always have the chord progression match the lyrical phrasing. Nice job

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V.S. Naipaul once advised a writing student to pay attention

to the shape of the lines. How do they appear visually?

 

 

This is a very interesting concept. I do find myself looking at lyrics in this manner. There seems to be a certain lyrical cadence that becomes evident on the page as well as in the performance.

 

I agree, btw, about that lyric........while it is important to the message of the song, it doesn't quite fit right.

 

Many thanks.

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I agree, btw, about that lyric........while it is important to the message of the song, it doesn't quite fit right.


Many thanks.

 

 

perhaps a little different wording would work..I'm not a song writer by any standards, I barely get by writing my name,,,lol.. so can't help on any ideas for change

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