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Question on a new song - Jaime (Don't Give Up Hope)


Oswlek

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I just finished recording a song that I was planning on add some layering to (bass, more guitars, some additional harmonies), but after hearing the bare essence I am no longer sure I want anything else there. I have to admit I rather like the feel of it with just one guitar and two vocals (one vocal most of the way through). It creates an intimate atmostphere that I think accentuates the theme of the song.

 

So I ask you, does it stand on its own? If you think something else should be added, what do you hear?

 

The song is a sad story about a young girl going through a difficult time. Here is a link.

 

http://www.reverbnation.com/justinosowiecki?popup_render=%2Fcontroller%2Fartist%2Fadd_song%2F701577#/artist/artist_songs/701577

 

Jaime, it's touch and go at this point

The accident has him all out of joint

You may go see him if you wish

Don't be surprised by his now vacant eyes


And please don't give up hope

When he needs you the most


Jaime, I can't show but I hear you, I feel you

I know you prayed for me last night

Your voice, your touch, your sweet scent

All that's left, all I have left


Please don't give up hope

When I need you the most


Poor Jaime


Jaime, this needn't be goodbye

In your heart you can keep him alive

Time moves on whether you want it to

Time moves on and so will you


Don't give up hope

 

Thanks in advance for your help. :thu:

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I'd add some hand percussion. There's so much space that it would sound great. And, I'd bring in a sencond guitar in any instrumental sections. Still sparse but with a little something.

 

You vocal effect at the end is cool. Maybe some backwards guitar in the instrumental sections.

 

Cool.

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I like it the way it is.


How did you record the guitar? It sounds like it's plugged in or maybe it's an odd mic position. Sounds like a drop-D tuning maybe?

 

Nice catch, the guitar is tuned down 1.5 steps. I wrote the song in standard but couldn't keep with the middle part vocally, so I just kept going lower until I found my comfort zone. :)

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:cool:

Did you record the git with a mic or plugged-in to the board?

 

Plugged into a m-audio Fast Track Pro.

 

I'd add some hand percussion. There's so much space that it would sound great. And, I'd bring in a sencond guitar in any instrumental sections. Still sparse but with a little something.


You vocal effect at the end is cool. Maybe some backwards guitar in the instrumental sections.


Cool.

 

I can defintely see the light percussion and the second guitar, those were ideas I was considering initially. But the backwards guitar... :idk:

 

I'd really have to hear that one.

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Plugged into a m-audio Fast Track Pro.

 

That's the only thing that bugs me about the recording. I can't stand the sound of plugged-in acoustics. Don't you sing into a mic? Your voice sounds great in it, and I'd bet that your acoustic would sound almost a million times better than the UST/piezo. Let your acoustic guitar be acoustic! :)

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Plugged into a m-audio Fast Track Pro.




I can defintely see the light percussion and the second guitar, those were ideas I was considering initially. But the backwards guitar...
:idk:

I'd really have to hear that one.

 

The backwards guitar came from what I thought I hard at first. You vocl at teh end has an interesing reverse verb kind of patch that sort of fit with the vacant eyes and sad reality being almost surreal. I'm not talking some phsycodelic freak out but more tasteful Beatlesy She's Leaving Home sadness.

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That's the only thing that bugs me about the recording. I can't stand the sound of plugged-in acoustics. Don't you sing into a mic? Your voice sounds great in it, and I'd bet that your acoustic would sound almost a million times better than the UST/piezo. Let your acoustic guitar be acoustic!
:)

 

My house is full of noise. More often than not there are kids running around, often times physically assaulting me while recording. :cop:

 

If I had to wait until quite time for both vocals and guitar I wouldn't get anything recorded!

 

Plus, I prefer to play the guitar sitting and there isn't a single chair in my house that doesn't creak outlandishly at the slightest shift in weight. Believe me, I've tried them all.

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My house is full of noise. More often than not there are kids running around, often times physically assaulting me while recording.
:cop:

If I had to wait until quite time for both vocals and guitar I wouldn't get anything recorded!


Plus, I prefer to play the guitar sitting and there isn't a single chair in my house that doesn't creak outlandishly at the slightest shift in weight. Believe me, I've tried them all.

 

:D

 

I actually like those kinds of sounds, especially chairs creaking outlandishly in the backgrounds of recordings. It's a helluvalot better than the piezo quack imo. I know we all try to achieve that pristine eat-off-the-floor studio thing, but it's really thrilling to hear the boisterous, bothersome world sneak a little dust and dirt into recordings. YMMV.

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The backwards guitar came from what I thought I hard at first. You vocl at teh end has an interesing reverse verb kind of patch that sort of fit with the vacant eyes and sad reality being almost surreal. I'm not talking some phsycodelic freak out but more tasteful Beatlesy She's Leaving Home sadness.

 

Ahhh...

 

Now I get you. I was thinking more "Rain" than "She's Leaving Home". :thu:

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:D

I actually like those kinds of sounds, especially chairs creaking outlandishly in the backgrounds of recordings. It's a helluvalot better than the piezo quack imo. I know we all try to achieve that pristine eat-off-the-floor studio thing, but it's really thrilling to hear the boisterous, bothersome world sneak a little dust and dirt into recordings. YMMV.

 

Funny that you mention it, I was talking with a buddy the other day about how in some Beatle songs you can hear creaking of chairs and glasses rattling on speakers. Those noises seem so charming when they do it, yet so amateurish when they appear in my songs.

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