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"Gabrielle" - lyrics in progress

Roosterhead S.

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This is still a work in progress (just finished this draft this morning, and I still need a bridge), but I was wondering if anyone had any opinions on what I have so far.


Musically, it's probably going to be acoustic, with maybe a little phaser on top, in the style of sort of a 60's doo wop or girl group ballad (think "Blue Moon").


Anyway, thanks, opinions are appreciated! :thu:




I knew you were my death bringer

When you colored this colorless soul

With lovesick vibrations, the aches and palpitations

Reciprocation I never would know


The birds

The bees


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First demo of what I have so far. Lots of editing/arranging to do at the moment. Plus, my drummer is going to put some really awesome harmonies over the whole thing, and come up with a bass or guitar part to put on top.


I also edited the lyrics in the first post to the latest draft.


Sorry, didn't use a windscreen so there are a few pops, plus a few mis-sung lyrics at the end. Also sorry for the croaking/sad excuse for singing. :lol:


Again, opinions are appreciated!

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Hmm. First thing - all that reverb makes it SO hard to really HEAR the song!! I'm not sure whether it's added on purposefully or if you were playing in a chamber somewhere. lol


I expected the song tune to be more ominous in the chorus, but that's just me. I like the verses tune, it's what I expected I think, somehow.


I like this...I'd like to hear it when it's more "done", you know? No reverb!! lol

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