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Runaways


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Here's one that is getting pretty close. A simple thing that came on pretty quickly. Didn't spend much time on the lyrics........curious as to how they will come across.

 

Bonus points, btw, to anyone who can tell me who's people will be suing me for everything I'm not worth when this one hits the charts.:cool:

 

Runaways

 

The night time in the city is so lonely

Looks like I can't stay

With you so far away

It seems that my dreams have outgrown me

On for something new

Guess that must be you.

 

So hey

Come the day

We'll run away

Yeah we'll be runaways

Hey

Come the day

We'll run away

Yeah we'll be runaways

 

We'll be runaways

We'll be runaways

Yeah we'll run away

We'll be runaways

 

The night time's not so pretty when you're lonely

Looks like I might pay

For the things I couldn't say

It seems like my dreams have disowned me

They're gone for something new

Guess that must be you

 

So hey

Come the day

We'll run away

Yeah we'll be runaways

 

We'll be runaways.

etc., etc., etc.

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Just commenting on lyrics here.

 

I like the chorus and I REALLY like the dreams have outgrown and disowned me.... guess that must be you. That is pretty cool, especially considering the nature of the chorus.

 

The opening lines of the verses could be stronger. Some specifics would help out a ton in those spots

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Soundclick is now blocked at my work... what a bummer.

 

It seems that my dreams have outgrown me

On for something new

Guess that must be you.

 

I love the imagery here with the dreams have outgrown me bit. The use of the word 'guess' makes it seem like the subject is a bit ambiguous about pursuing something new... if that's what you're going for, then its good to go. I almost picture you (him) sighing and thinking "Well, I'm washed up here in the big city... might as well go with her because she's the only thing I got going now".

 

Was that the intent?

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Very good. Great groove.

 

I have a thing about your stopping. It works great in most songs. But, I think there are probably too many in this song. You're breaking the flow of a great groove. In my simple mind I like the one at, "Hey." And probably something in that last chorus. The other ones do more to break the flow than they add in punctuation. While listening, I just wanted to rock-on in the groove.

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Bon Jovi?

 

 

That was my first thought, but after listening I'm pretty sure it's the "run run run run runaway" part that Len is talking about. That sounds very familiar in a "song I absolutely should know but can't put my finger on it" kind of way.

 

This is a great song, Len. I have no real feedback to offer.

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Very good. Great groove.


I have a
thing
about your stopping. It works great in most songs. But, I think there are probably too many in this song. You're breaking the flow of a great groove. In my simple mind I like the one at, "Hey." And probably something in that last chorus. The other ones do more to break the flow than they add in punctuation. While listening, I just wanted to rock-on in the groove.

 

 

I have that thing too, but at a certain point I just decided that it wasn't that big a deal and that I would just go with the Lenny-ness of it all.

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I have that
thing
too, but at a certain point I just decided that it wasn't that big a deal and that I would just go with the Lenny-ness of it all.

 

 

Oh it's a small thing for sure. Lenny-ness is great. But we're talking about the world outside our little club. And that world needs Lenny-ness ! I just thought it would be more effective if it weren't diluted.

 

But I don't know nuttin.

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I love the imagery here with the dreams have outgrown me bit. The use of the word 'guess' makes it seem like the subject is a bit ambiguous about pursuing something new... if that's what you're going for, then its good to go. I almost picture you (him) sighing and thinking "Well, I'm washed up here in the big city... might as well go with her because she's the only thing I got going now".

 

My regular old comment here is I love this song. lol. Nothing much more to add. I thought the more frequent pauses were actually kinda fitting to this song for some reason. Because they were more frequent, I thought they seemed to become part of the overall rhythm of the song.

 

Hey Lenny, what'd ya think of Bee's comment I quoted? Is that correct? :p lol

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The opening lines of the verses could be stronger. Some specifics would help out a ton in those spots

 

I share that feeling........need to keep that night time thing in there to set up the "Come the day" line, though.

 

Thanks to all of you for listening and commenting.

 

I really tried hard to play this one straight through. Had a stern talking to with myself about it and then picked up the guitar with the intention of strumming my way through to groove heaven.

 

Didn't happen.

 

I am hopeless.:facepalm:

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