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"Anatomy Lesson" -- song idea, rough-draft lyric -- whaddaya think?


LCK

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I've been having trouble sleeping. As a result, my usual mental filters aren't working very well first thing in the morning. Random thoughts that flit through my brain get special attention.

 

I wrote this rough-draft lyric (with the guitar) this morning.

 

It feels to me like this has some real potential. Anyone else think so?

 

"Anatomy Lesson"

 

The human body has 206 bones,

7 major organs, 100 trillion cells.

The average human heart beats 2 billion times

during the life span of the human body.

 

The human brain has 2 separate hemispheres,

with a natural propensity for speech, logic and math.

The human mind has to explain things.

The human mind has to know why.

 

The human hand has opposable thumbs

enabling us to make and hold weapons for killing prey.

It also enables us to grasp and hold things, pencils and coffee cups.

The human hand sometimes needs to be held.

 

Human emotions are readily apparent in human behavior

but for the most part, they

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It's different from you. Interesting as an example of a more abstract lyrical approach. The turnaround from the abstract/factual to the personal/emotional is good and surprising. I don't think the number of bones is directly related to the heart. In general, heart as metaphor is a little tired for me (granted, it has worked well for centuries, but...).

 

I kind of want more from the Anatomy Lesson parts. Graverobbers, Leonardo da Vinci, surgical knives, corpses, the morgues from CSI and police/coroner procedurals, dissection, how hard it is to physically reach the heart. Not just a recitation from the relevant wikpedia page :cop:.

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As stated this is VERY different for you - yes i like the idea of it but i think id like some rhymes

 

The human body has 206 bones,

7 major organs, 46 chromosones

The average human heart beats 2 billion times

Before we're ready to depart from this gift we all call life

 

for example.

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As stated this is VERY different for you - yes i like the idea of it but i think id like some rhymes

 

 

Ah-hah, but the idea was (at least partially) to write without any rhymes.

 

I'll upload the tune later tonight (or tomorrow).

 

LCK

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Ah-hah, but the idea was (at least partially) to write without any rhymes.


I'll upload the tune later tonight (or tomorrow).


LCK

 

Lately, I've been listening to and experimenting with songs that do not have a lot of rhymes.

 

It seems to me the delivery needs to be just right.

 

Looking forward to hearing this one.:thu:

 

Jeff

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There are so many successful songs that don't use a rhyme scheme and rely on cadence alone.

For example : Across the Universe.

 

 

Well, I'm not sure this one is up to that level, but here it is (with a title change).

 

 

"The Life of the Human Body"

 

The human body has 206 bones,

7 major organs, and trillions of cells.

The average human heart beats 2 billion times

in the life of the average human body.

The life of the human body.

 

The human brain has 2 hemispheres,

hardwired for language, logic, and art.

The human brain is designed to explain things.

The human mind always has to know why.

We need to know why.

 

 

 

 

(break)

 

 

 

 

 

The human hand has opposable thumbs

allowing us to fabricate weapons,

and hold pencils and car keys and coffee cups.

And sometimes the human hand just needs to be held.

It sometimes needs to be held.

 

Human emotions are readily apparent

but scientifically hard to pin down.

Basic human emotions include lust, anger, and shame,

and a deep-rooted fear of being alone.

People don

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I think this is an especially good song. I like the incremental introduction in each verse of human emotion added to the basic text book information (unrhymed).

It will benefit from being fleshed out a little with instrumentation, but the raw material is rock solid.

 

It doesn't have any connection musically or lyrically with the 'Bookends' album, but it carries the same pathos of some of Paul Simon's lines like, "There's no times left except the New York Times" or "We laughed them all - in a very short time".

 

Congratulations Lee - you have captured that indescribable and elusive something in this one.

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I think this is an especially good song.

 

Me too.....listening as I write. Ah....whistling.:cool:

 

You are singing this in a very delicate manner.....very nice. Very...poignant. The human hand needs to be held.

 

Wow....this is a fantastic song, Lee.

 

Throwing those 'I miss yous' in there at the end is just absolutely brilliant!:wave:

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Me too.....listening as I write. Ah....whistling.
:cool:

You are singing this in a very delicate manner.....very nice. Very...poignant. The human hand needs to be held.


Wow....this is a fantastic song, Lee.


Throwing those 'I miss yous' in there at the end is just absolutely brilliant!
:wave:

 

Thanks, Lenny (and everyone else)!

 

I have no idea where any of this came from, including the "I miss yous" at the end. (Though I obviously had to google some of the basic statistics.)

 

Wish I had a band to add bass, percussion and maybe an oboe or soprano sax.

 

LCK

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Sounds like an America Song. The lyrics are well suited for a Muppet song on Sesame Street, the beat would have to take off a bit to allow for Animal to have a drum solo...the emotions part - it might lose the kids there....

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Moving. All the clinical talk feels like someone trying to distract themselves until finally saying what they really felt at the very end. It works wonderfully.

 

 

Thanks. Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking as the song was coming to me. Although, to be totally honest, I had no idea what the payoff was going to be. Those last three sentences -- "I miss you, I miss you, I miss you" -- came out of nowhere.

 

I was actually shocked to hear myself singing them...

 

LCK

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So for reference purposes -- in case no one remembers it -- here's the non-rhyming song stickboy was referring to when he started the September Block Buster Challenge...

 

"The Life of the Human Body"

 

The human body has 206 bones,

with 7 major organs, and trillions of cells.

The human heart can beat 2 billion times or more

during the life of the average human body,

the life of the human body.

 

The human brain has 2 hemispheres,

hardwired for language, music, and thought.

The human brain is designed to explain things.

The human mind always has to know why.

We have to know why.

 

 

 

(break)

 

 

 

 

 

The human hand hasopposable thumbs

which allows us to fabricate weapons,

and to hold kite strings and car keys and coffee cups.

But sometimes it just needs to be held.

The human hand sometimes needs to be held.

 

Human emotions are readily apparent

yet scientifically hard to pin down.

Human emotions include lust and anger and shame,

and a deep-rooted fear of isolation.

Humans don

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