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Monthly Blockbusters Challenge : SEPTEMBER


stickboymusic

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This months challenge is going to be one that came from a song LCK posted a while back.

 

The challenge:

 

 

Write a song where the verses don't rhyme

 

Rules:

 

This is about not focussing on those last words of the lines everytime and just saying whatever you want to say

 

The song can be in any style you see fit

 

You may have a rhyming hook/chorus if you NEED to but if you can avoid this too then all the better.

 

Good luck!

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1st draft. It is an odd thing to not rhyme for me. But instead of using the opportunity to get heavy I'll go light and up. Rah rah! I honestly finished just right now before I realized it's awfully close to Nike's Just Do It. I'll most likely have to re-think it. But in the spirit of reacting to a challenge I'll post the first knock off. Rah rah!

 

EDIT: Changed a few little things to remove a vaguely near rhyme.

 

Get Up, Get Out, Go Do It

 

V1

There

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I started something last night, let's see if I can finish before this contest is over... It's tentatively called "Can't Keep Sittin' Down" (trying something different with tempo and style here, going more uptempo, but and the subject matter may be on my lighter-side, but actually comes from the fact I broke my tailbone a few years ago cycling... and I do in fact have trouble sitting for long periods without getting a sore backside....)

 

Lets see if I can turn that into a song under Stick's rules, though moving away from rhyme in the verse may cause me trouble...

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Two people so far have said that writing without rhymes may prove difficult.

Can I assure you that it's not.

Rhyme as a focus can be replaced by sentence rhythm and cadence as the focus.

 

Some of George Harrison and John Lennon's songs didn't use rhyme schemes.

Sometimes just the occasional rhyme with the hook or title line.

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Two people so far have said that writing without rhymes may prove difficult.

Can I assure you that it's not.

Rhyme as a focus can be replaced by sentence rhythm and cadence as the focus.


Some of George Harrison and John Lennon's songs didn't use rhyme schemes.

Sometimes just the occasional rhyme with the hook or title line.

 

 

Great point about rhythm and cadence.

 

Still, rhyme-less writing is a peculiar feeling for me. But a good one. This challenge has really been an eye opener for my typical methods. I'm used to rhyme driving the story to some degree. Then I'll play with rhyme till a happy accident occurs and some interesting plot development occurs. Based on my options of rhyme and picking the most interesting candidate. Rhythm and cadence are all a part of that for me.

 

But with this...

 

It's strictly: rhythm, cadence, musical prosody and meaning. And of course the sounds of the words and phrases.

 

So it occurred to me that maybe starting a song as a rhyme-less song, then later adding rhyme to your phrases, might have some cool advantages. You're driving the story with more autonomy. Your playfulness gets directed to components of the song that might not otherwise be asked to join in on the fun... then the layer of rhyme is added and forced to support a more developed story.

 

Interesting.

 

Sometimes when I listen to rhyme-less songs, or at least songs that include the rhyme-less idea in sections, part of the show is the lack of rhyme.

 

Waiting, waiting, waiting for the rhyme

To sound complete like bells that splat

 

"Splat" where chime was expected.

 

The "messing wit chu" game of apparent wrongness, or maybe just awkwardness. But lack of rhyme doesn't have to do that. It can sound right too. And that rightness I think, based on very little experience so far for me, can be the results of letting cadence, rhythm and meaning taking over. This is fun.

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Here's one I came up with. I guess the first chorus has a couple things that rhyme, as it turns out... Ah, well, sacrifices made for the art, or something...

 

 

'Buzzard Bag Rag'

 

If the buzzard

is in the bag

and the whiskeys in the cupboard

Break out that bottle girl

and pour me a drink right now

 

Ain't nobody

shouts for joy

when the taxman comes a callin'

He takes your money, goes out running,

Leaves a poor man in your chair

 

(Ch1)

So stay

here tonight

and help finish off this bottle

There ain't no way

to make it right

So we might just as well party down all night again

 

On the road

it's no trouble

to keep the wheels between the lines

I should be back by dawn

if my tired old car don't die

 

So leave my drink

in your bottle

Leave my wallet full of green

I should be back by tomorrow

and I'll tell you what I seen

 

(Ch2)

So keep

your door open

And don't turn out the lights

Soon I

will hold you tight

and we might just as well party down all night again

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  • 3 weeks later...
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Hey, that's right! October is here!


I love October. It's my favorite month...


LCK

 

 

That gave me an idea. The thing is, I thought I was exempt from last month's challenge, due to the wonderfulness of the "Life of the Human Body." (Seriously, I have no idea where that song came from, so if I can't take credit for writing it, I can at least honestly stand a little in awe of it.)

 

Anyway, I do love October. I'm not sure this works, but here's my contribution to Sept.'s challenge.

 

 

"It's Always Summer in Your Mind"

 

I love October.

the warm glow in distant windows,

as yellow as quaking aspens.

And I love you.

But it's always summer in your mind.

 

I love December.

The smell of pine trees and woodsmoke,

I love the snowflakes and breath clouds.

You love them too.

But it's always summer in your mind.

 

If I were a painter

I'd paint us together

in the desert or the mountains.

You'd paint seascapes and sailboats,

and the free wind

blowing in your hair.

 

I love April

watching the brown turn back to green,

hearing the birds chirp in the sunlight.

But when I think of you in April,

guess what I find?

 

It's always summer in my mind.

 

 

Words & Music
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