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Steampunk Suzie


oldgitplayer

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There's been a thread in recent days that was about a song that's structure was fairly well grounded on the song, 'Imagine'. I found it easy to spot.

 

On the advice of a songwriting book, as an exercise a few months ago, I wrote some lyrics to established song structures. It was a fun exercise, and I used songs with strong and diverse structures for the exercise. This is one of them - I'm sure you'll recognise it in an instant :

 

Steampunk Suzie

 

Chorus

Steampunk Suzie, will ya

Steampunk Suzie, won't ya

Steampunk Suze, why don't you turn up your amp

And when it's nicely cranked

Then play it raw

Steampunk Suzie, won't you play me some steampunk guitar

 

Verse 1

You used to play all kinds of music

The straight-up and the clean

The slick stylizers

With sickly synthesisers

Til you found steampunk machines

 

Chorus

Steampunk Suzie, will ya

Steampunk Suzie, won't ya

Steampunk Suze, why don't you turn up your amp

And when it's nicely cranked

Then play it raw

Steampunk Suzie, won't you play me some steampunk guitar

 

Verse 2

I sometimes saw you playing

And I always turned away

You never played badly

But your sound never grabbed me

Now that steampunk makes me stay

 

Chorus

Steampunk Suzie, will ya

Steampunk Suzie, won't ya

Steampunk Suze, why don't you turn up your amp

And when it's nicely cranked

Then play it raw

Steampunk Suzie, won't you play me some steampunk guitar

 

Verse 3

So now I took to playing

I think you'ld like my tone

I'll slip on the leather

And let's jam together

So I can slide steampunk trombone

 

Chorus

Steampunk Suzie, will ya

Steampunk Suzie, won't ya

Steampunk Suze, why don't you turn up your amp

And when it's nicely cranked

Then play it raw

Steampunk Suzie, won't you play me some steampunk guitar

 

Coda

Steampunk Suzie, won't you play me some steampunk guitar

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No, there's no tune - it was purely an exercise in writing a lyric in an established song structure.

I thought it would be an obvious one. If not - I'm tempted to pull out some 7th chords and develop some vocal melody.

I'll play the enigmatic game until somebody gets it. I know you must know it, as it came from a great songwriting partnership of the 50's & 60's.

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Anthem time! :D

 

I think the repetition and parallel construction should serve it well. I was able to supply my own (perhaps vaguely steampunk, perhaps not) imaginary musical background, but, of course, we'd know more with development on that front. The trombone was an interesting choice. I'll admit, I'm not really clued into the steampunk thing very well, and don't know anything about associated musical styles, but, of course, the simple mechanics of the slide trombone probably offer a rich symbol of simple technology with infinite possibility. An know one who saw Bruce Fowler playing slide with Captain Beeheart in the 80s would doubt that instrument's edge or authority.

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The only thing that comes to mind is the Nick Lowe/Rockpile Switchboard Susan. But that's 80's and you're saying 50's/60's writers. We're probably talking Leiber and Stoller?

 

I'm thinking the key to the reference is the will you/won't you pairing -- and a couple of such references seem hazily just out of reach to me this a.m. on that. Isn't there a line from a sixties or seventies song that follows that pair with a line about won't you cool my engine down?

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I'll play the enigmatic game until somebody gets it. I know you must know it, as it came from a great songwriting partnership of the 50's & 60's.

 

 

I don't enjoy these games very much, I must say. Just tell us!

 

Whenever I've used another song as a template for what I've written, I'm more than happy to tell everybody. When I wrote "Brooklyn Sunday," eg., I stated very clearly that I was copying the basic structure from The Beach Boys song "Let Him Run Wild."

 

So what is it?

 

LCK

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I feel like the lyric "Do you? Don't you? Will you, won't you? Did I get a real one? " is in an Andy Pratt song somewhere.

 

(I was thinking this one but I haven't sat down and parsed it all out.)

 

But I did find this song -- rather long in the tooth according to the accompanying date, so old, in fact, that we apparently don't have to worry about copyright restraints in its case...

 

DO YOU ? DON'T YOU ? WILL YOU ? WON'T YOU ?

(Eddy Eckels / Leroy Stover, 1909)

 

Do you know my heart's aching,

Wondering if you'll say no,

Don't you see that it's breaking,

Because I love you so,

Will you give me a chance dear,

Girlies like you are quite few,

Won't you think dear

how lonesome life is without a girl like you;

 

Do you remember kid days,

You used to tease me then too,

Don't you see with those kid ways,

That you make me feel blue,

Will you come close and whisper,

That you've been teasing in fun,

Won't you be mine for now

I think it's time our hearts were made one;

 

Do you, Don't you, Will you, Won't you

Love me sweetheart dear,

Can I, Can't I, Shall I, Shan't I

with you be sincere,

Will you, won't you love but me,

Would you, could you, happy be,

Do you? Don't you? Will you?

Won't you love me tenderly?

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8.15 am over here, and I see there's been a bit of guessing going on during the night, but nobody uncovered its identity!?!...? It's an easy one.

The lyrics are not influenced by anything specifically - they're just a bit of fun.

 

Steampunk as a genre has never been used as music as far as I know, as it's a visual thing.

And although it wasn't named steampunk back then, Terry Gilliam's sets inside the Department in the film 'Brazil' may have invented the idea.

Set in the future, but the inter-office communication was by Lamson tube and the computers were 1900's Remingtons with big magnifyers attached to them.

 

Anyway - the song structure is 100% Doc Pomus & Mort Schuman - 'Little Sister'.

I haven't done any alternative music yet that I consider successful.

 

Thanks for coming out to play :)

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8.15 am over here, and I see there's been a bit of guessing going on during the night, but nobody uncovered its identity!?!...? It's an easy one.

The lyrics are not influenced by anything specifically - they're just a bit of fun.


Steampunk as a genre has never been used as music as far as I know, as it's a visual thing.

And although it wasn't named steampunk back then, Terry Gilliam's sets inside the Department in the film 'Brazil' may have invented the idea.

Set in the future, but the inter-office communication was by Lamson tube and the computers were 1900's Remingtons with big magnifyers attached to them.


Anyway - the song structure is 100% Doc Pomus & Mort Schuman - 'Little Sister'.

I haven't done any alternative music yet that I consider successful.


Thanks for coming out to play
:)

 

Damn! I almost had it! Don'tcha... Won'tcha... it kept ringing that bell. Damn!

 

Steampunk is such a great name. I remember the PCs from 15 years ago in the steampunk style. Good call on Gilliam too... I never thought about it but yeah, his whole visual style was steampunk.

 

As far as the lyric, you know, there's something there. Why don't you add some accoutrements to the amp and guitar? A pump bellows for the amp's coal fire and...

 

More coal under the boiler, turn it up to 12

locomotive steam, girl you really make it scream!

Take your gee-taar off the shelf

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