Members tony333 Posted December 31, 2016 Members Share Posted December 31, 2016 Working title is Sunshine. Just lyrics and in my head so far. Sunshine Out here in the distance the days don't seem to changeMonday turns to Sunday afternoon Everything is burning and we really need the rainBut the sky is just another shade of blue Every time I turn around the wind is in my faceFeeling like I’m pushing straight uphill I have never been the kind to take the easy wayNever have and bet I probably never will Twilight brings the darkness and the walls start closing inThis house feels like one big empty room Moon don't seem to notice and the stars don't seem to careThat all I can think about is you chorusOhhhhh Sunshine I can’t stand to see you cryWash away the sadness with your lightOhhhh Sunshine will you be mine in timeAll we have to do is hold on tightOh how I wish I could hold you tight I would give up all my futures for one more dance with youTo hold you in my arms and see you smile Been so lost without you, never sure of my next turnAnd I don't think I can make another mile So I lay down and close my eyes but the dreams won’t stay awayAbout that time we had right after school I reach out to grab your hand but you slowly drift awayAin't it funny how the wind can be so cruel? I can’t keep you off my mind, these scars don't ever fadeEspecially if you never want them to So I just wait and hold on tight, knowing things may never changeI guess there’s really nothing else to do chorusOhhhhh Sunshine I can’t stand to see you cryWash away the sadness with your lightOhhhh Sunshine will you be mine in timeAll we have to do is hold on tightOh how I wish I could hold you tight Sunshine it don't burn my skin, she warms me from withinLives inside my heart and in my head I don't think I'll ever learn to turn my eyes awayEvery time she sets it takes away my breath ChorusOhhhhh Sunshine I can’t stand to see you cryWash away the sadness with your lightOhhhh Sunshine will you be mine in timeAll we have to do is hold on tightOh how I wish I could hold you tight Alt ChorusOhhhhh Sunshine I can’t stand to see you cryWash away the sadness from your eyesOhhhh Sunshine will you be mine in timeAll we have to do is hold on tightI just want to hold you tight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Idunno Posted December 31, 2016 Members Share Posted December 31, 2016 Very cool. Already singing it. I have it on a melody in my head. Interested in a scratch take of the 1st & chorus? I can bring it here today probably. It would be a welcome diversion from painting my house, better half opinion pending, of course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tony333 Posted December 31, 2016 Author Members Share Posted December 31, 2016 Very cool. Already singing it. I have it on a melody in my head. Interested in a scratch take of the 1st & chorus? I can bring it here today probably. It would be a welcome diversion from painting my house' date=' better half opinion pending, of course.[/quote'] That would be cool to hear if your up for it. Can compare to what I hear in my head. thanks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Idunno Posted January 1, 2017 Members Share Posted January 1, 2017 That would be cool to hear if your up for it. Can compare to what I hear in my head. thanks Tomorrow. Got shanghaied to paint so best to wait a day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Idunno Posted January 1, 2017 Members Share Posted January 1, 2017 tony333 - Meant to say these are really good lyrics. Well done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Idunno Posted January 1, 2017 Members Share Posted January 1, 2017 First 4 lines and chorus. Pretty stiff because I was reading as I recorded. I had a choice between a minor fall or a major lift (Leonard Cohen) and these lyrics seemed more towards the minor fall. Concert pitch in the key of Am. The lyrics all seem to have an essential quality to them. I ran through the whole song a couple times as-is. It gets to be monotonous and needs a key change or other dynamic I could bring into it. But, that would be a waste of time if the current tone and temper of it isn't what you are looking to do. Love to hear what's going on inside your head arrangement/melody-wise. https://app.box.com/s/r6ucsrcahyx5qbwc1pzus076xueimkgc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tony333 Posted January 2, 2017 Author Members Share Posted January 2, 2017 First, thanks for doing that. Really cool. And very weird to hear someone else singing words I have written. I have been messing with it a little bit. My playing and "singing" are not nearly as nice as yours. I also don't have any musical or theory training so I mostly pick up a guitar and fumble around until something sounds "right". I have a more "country/americana" sound in my head. Full band for the first 2 verses and choruses and then when it gets to "Sunshine it dont burn my skin....." that is just flat picking acoustic guitar and then full band back at that chorus. When I am playing it right now the verses are D Am7 Em D. I am trying to figure out where to go with the chorus to change it up and add some dynamic. I have also been messing with the tempo and am trying to settle into something. I will try to post at least me singing later today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Idunno Posted January 2, 2017 Members Share Posted January 2, 2017 I can hear your progression and arrangement well enough from what you've written. I like the acoustic breakout and return to the band where you placed it. I thought that verse was placed there for something different. Knowing the genre now brings better focus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Delmont Posted February 5, 2017 Members Share Posted February 5, 2017 Nice! Tight! You might stumble over "probably" - unless you live here in Maine, where it's a two-syllable word: prully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Idunno Posted February 5, 2017 Members Share Posted February 5, 2017 Nice! Tight! You might stumble over "probably" - unless you live here in Maine' date=' where it's a two-syllable word: prully.[/quote'] LOL. Yep. Probly was my experience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Delmont Posted February 6, 2017 Members Share Posted February 6, 2017 LOL. Yep. Probly was my experience. =O) Where I live, it's: "I'll git theyah prully Saddy, Good lawd willin and the crick don't rise." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members tony333 Posted February 6, 2017 Author Members Share Posted February 6, 2017 Thanks and in Va it's probly as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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