The Political Party

[Mossy Mossy Mo…]

11 Then the Lord said to Moses, 12 “Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘If a man’s wife goes astray and is unfaithful to him 13 so that another man has sexual relations with her,and this is hidden from her husband and her impurity is undetected (since there is no witness against her and she has not been caught in the act), 14 and if feelings of jealousy come over her husband and he suspects his wife and she is impure—or if he is jealous and suspects her even though she is not impure— 15 then he is to take his wife to the priest. He must also take an offering of a tenth of an ephah[a] of barley flour on her behalf. He must not pour olive oil on it or put incense on it, because it is a grain offering for jealousy, a reminder-offering to draw attention to wrongdoing.

16 “‘The priest shall bring her and have her stand before the Lord. 17 Then he shall take some holy water in a clay jar and put some dust from the tabernacle floor into the water.18 After the priest has had the woman stand before the Lord, he shall loosen her hair and place in her hands the reminder-offering, the grain offering for jealousy, while he himself holds the bitter water that brings a curse. 19 Then the priest shall put the woman under oath and say to her, “If no other man has had sexual relations with you and you have not gone astray and become impure while married to your husband, may this bitter water that brings a curse not harm you. 20 But if you have gone astray while married to your husband and you have made yourself impure by having sexual relations with a man other than your husband”— 21 here the priest is to put the woman under this curse—“may the Lord cause you to become a curse[b] among your people when he makes your womb miscarry and your abdomen swell.

Exodus 21:22

"Now suppose two men are fighting, and in the process they accidentally strike a pregnant woman so she gives birth prematurely. If no further injury results, the man who struck the woman must pay the amount of compensation the woman's husband demands and the judges approve."

The Good Lord never considered abortion murder. Murder wasn't punishable by a fine. 

[Tom Hicks · Accepted solution]

how do fundis simultaneously hold two opposing belief systems in their minds? and doesn't that create inner turmoil?

[Mossy Mossy Mo…]

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Tom Hicks wrote:

how do fundis simultaneously hold two opposing belief systems in their minds? and doesn't that create inner turmoil?

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They don't actually believe anything that's in the Bible. They've created their own ad hoc version of the Bible that exists in the form of Christian memes.

[Tom Hicks]

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Mossy Mossy Moss wrote:

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Tom Hicks wrote:

how do fundis simultaneously hold two opposing belief systems in their minds? and doesn't that create inner turmoil?

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They don't actually believe anything that's in the Bible. They've created their own ad hoc version of the Bible that exists in the form of Christian memes.

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my understanding of old testament theology is that homosexuality is condemned in the same harsh terms as people eating shellfish.

and something about the stoning to death of disobediant children?

to me, it all seems like some ancient and backward tribal mythology gone bad, totally unsuited for the modern world. but maybe the fundis will join in and rationalize it for us.

[Mossy Mossy Mo…]

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Tom Hicks wrote:

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Mossy Mossy Moss wrote:

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Tom Hicks wrote:

how do fundis simultaneously hold two opposing belief systems in their minds? and doesn't that create inner turmoil?

---

They don't actually believe anything that's in the Bible. They've created their own ad hoc version of the Bible that exists in the form of Christian memes.

---

my understanding of old testament theology is that homosexuality is condemned in the same harsh terms as people eating shellfish.

and something about the stoning to death of disobediant children?

to me, it all seems like some ancient and backward tribal mythology gone bad, totally unsuited for the modern world. but maybe the fundis will join in and rationalize it for us.

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Well, you see, while it's true that this primitive tribal god explicitly stated that these backwards rules and regulations were to stand as the law forever and ever, Paul came around several hundred years later and said God changed his mind about that. Christians take that to mean God changed his mind about most of it - not the stuff about killing gay people or burning witches. 

[Bowe]

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Tom Hicks wrote:

my understanding of old testament theology is that homosexuality is condemned in the same harsh terms as people eating shellfish.

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in the Bible, shrimp is called an abomonation 4 times more often than homosexuality

[Tom Hicks]

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Bowe wrote:

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Tom Hicks wrote:

my understanding of old testament theology is that homosexuality is condemned in the same harsh terms as people eating shellfish.

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in the Bible, shrimp is called an abomonation 4 times more often than homosexuality

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just don't order any shrimp at the old testament bar and grill then. problem solved.

[Bowe]

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Tom Hicks wrote:

just don't order any shrimp at the old testament bar and grill then. problem solved.

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I like to eat shrimp while watching gay porn

it really pisses God off

[Tom Hicks]

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Bowe wrote:

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Tom Hicks wrote:

just don't order any shrimp at the old testament bar and grill then. problem solved.

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I like to eat shrimp while watching gay porn

it really pisses God off

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even better - eating jumbo shrimp while formulating military intelligence.