08-04-2012 07:54 AM
08-04-2012 08:27 AM
Very compelling track. Can you provide the lyric? It's hard to make out what's being sung in some spots. LCK
Hi. I haven't posted here before, but I recently finished a track and wondered if anyone fancied a listen? http://soundcloud.com/adacto/on-the-ground-premixm p3 Critique welcome Thank you Jon
08-04-2012 08:32 AM
08-04-2012 08:58 AM
Yes, they are. There are places, though, where I think they're a bit strained. For example: This is how I now envisage you (you can never escape light) Seems so easy now I try Try to be creative just for you (but you sound so insecure) To me the word "envisage" is too overly artistic and arty, like you're trying too hard, which is reinforced by the next two lines where you're talking about how hard you're trying to be creative. That's a "tell," man! Don't let the audience see behind the curtain! So what I would do is find another way to talk about how you picture this person. Maybe say just that: This is how I always picture you (you can never escape light) Then I would change the stuff about how you're trying to be creative. Other than that, I think the lyric is pretty good overall. LCK
That's pretty much it, lyrics are kind of ambiguous!
08-04-2012 10:11 AM
08-04-2012 10:31 AM
08-04-2012 02:36 PM
08-04-2012 08:09 PM
08-10-2012 04:21 AM
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