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goosefartfan

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    Texting in my SUV in your kid's school zone with yellow flashing lights

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  1. At a gig in 92 or so, when I was 17. There were this group of mid-30ish ladies hanging out a the bar when we got there, and one of them took a liking to me as soon as we got there for load in. She bought me a drink after we got set up and sound checked, and I was like "OMG awesome!", being somewhat green. I wanted to invite her over to hang with us but the other guys said no, you dont wanna look too eager, make her come to you, etc. We started the first set and she came up and started dancing all sexy in front of me. Actually distracted me from playing a couple times. After the first set, she started chatting me up, you know the usual "Oh you are such a good guitar player" and "oh you guys rock" type of {censored}. I was Mr. Smooth and told her that beautiful women dancing in front of me was a great inspiration More random flirty banter took place, more sexy dancing took place, and by the end of the third set, her dance moves were becoming very suggestive. Third set break, she says we should go out and hang in the car. We went out to the car and she busted out a couple rails that were at least half a G each. She then proceeded to orally appreciate me for awhile. I actually had to stop her and say "err, I think I have to go on again..." So, fourth set, and I am in a great mood. I have a huge raging hard on still, and it is affecting my brain, I was in rock star mode. I seriously think that is still THE best stage presence I have ever had. She jumps onstage during a song break, wraps her arms around my neck and says to me "I want you to take me home and {censored} me boneless." which is a great phrase that I still use to this day. Fourth set ends, and I suddenly realize - I am 17, I live with my parents. I still have {censored}ing Star Wars posters on my wall FFS. So I told her "I live with two of the guys in the band in a one bedroom apartment, we cant go there.... lets go back to your place." The rest of the band was older than me by a bit, and they knew I was fairly green, so they let me skip loadout, with the drummer promising me that he'd get my rig back to the practise space intact. So we get to her place, and it is a {censored}ing disaster area. Three week old dishes everywhere, two crazy ass kids hopped up on candy that the "babysitter" had given them, dirty clothes all over the place, rank smell, the whole 9. The "babysitter" was this dude who was in love with her and really didnt like me being there. He hung out for TWO {censored}ING HOURS. Undaunted, I decide that the {censored} is worth it and deal. Finally after TWO {censored}ING HOURS, the "babysitter" leaves, the kids are in bed, and we start getting into it. I am in the process of {censored}ing her boneless when I put my foot into something cold, wet, and squishy that has found its way under the covers. It all caught up with me right there. The blow, the nasty ass apartment, the weird dude staring daggers at me for TWO {censored}ING HOURS, the crazy kids, and now the what-the-{censored} ever is stuck between my toes. I lost it, and by "it" I mean my erection. Turns out one of the kids was having some cheerios in the bed and dumped the {censored} all over, and then decided the best way to work with that was to pull the covers over it and forget it. So she gets that taken care of, and I'm ready to go again. Its like 5AM now though, and she is done. After an incomplete BJ, and then incomplete sex, I was about ready to burst. I was like "lets do more coke and get our {censored} on" but she wasnt hearing it. I ended up taking a short walk by myself in the bathroom. :shame: Then later that day, the drummer calls and tells me that my 412 managed to fall out of the {censored}ing truck. On the highway at >60MPH. It survived but had alot of "character" after that. As a bit of redemption, she was at a gig we did a few months later, and I took her back to my place (nice new apartment) and {censored}ed her boneless that night. As a nice bonus, my roommate heard it all going down and decided SHE wanted to get it on with me as well. nice ending, but what did you tell your parents about where you was last nite?
  2. Hey Guys, MIJ Les Pauls A JTM 45 Clone Dumble Type Amp(omega modded hrdlx?) Princeton Reverb more details please on the above
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