A Joke

[Tartanlad]

There was a very self-sufficient blind man, who did a lot of traveling alone. He was making his first trip to Texas and happened to be seated next to a Texan on the flight.

 

The Texan spent a lot of time telling him how everything is bigger and better in Texas. By the time the blind man had reached his destination, a large resort hotel, he was very excited about being in Texas.

The long trip had worn him out a little so he decided to stop at the bar for a small soda and a light snack before going up to his room to unpack this clothes.

 

When the waitress set down his drink, it was in a huge mug. "Wow, I had heard everything in Texas is bigger," he told her.

"That's right,"she replied. The blind man ate his snack and finished his drink. After drinking such a large amount, it was only natural his next stop was going to have to be the restroom. He asked the waitress for directions. She told him to turn left at the register and it would be the second door on the right.

He reached the first door and continued down the hall. A few steps later he stumbled slightly and missed the second door altogether and ended up going through the 3rd door instead. Not realizing he had entered the swimming area he walked forward and immediately fell into the swimming pool.

Remembering everything he had heard about things being bigger in Texas, as soon as he had his head above water he started shouting "Don't flush! Don't flush

[gull12]

[Tartanlad]

A old man was sitting in the front row at a town meeting, heckling the mayor as he delivered a long speech

 

Finally the mayor could stand it no longer, so he pointed to the heckler and said, "will that gentleman please stand up and tell the audience what he has ever done for the good of the city

 

Well Mr. Mayor," the man said in a firm voice. "I voted against you in the last election

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Did you hear about the Scotsman who washed his kilt?

 

he couldn't do a fling with it

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Why do bagpipers like to march as they play the bagpipes?

A moving target is harder to hit

[gull12]

A woman goes to the dentist because of severe tooth pain. After examining her, the dentist tells her she will have to have a root canal.

She says, "Oh no. that's so painful! Between root canal and childbirth, I'd rather have another baby!" The dentist said, "Well, hurry up and make up your mind, lady, I have to adjust the Chair!"

[Tartanlad]

A woman goes to the dentist because of severe tooth pain. After examining her, the dentist tells her she will have to have a root canal. She says, "Oh no. that's so painful! Between root canal and childbirth, I'd rather have another baby!" The dentist said, "Well, hurry up and make up your mind, lady, I have to adjust the Chair!"

 

good wan gull ..

 

Check ma jokes Headlined "More Jokes"

[Opa John]

An old lady sits down at the same dining table with a young lady at an open cafeteria.

 

After she finishes her meal, the younger lady lights up a cigarette and begins smoking it.

 

The older lady says, "Well, I'd rather commit adultery than smoke a cigarette in public."

 

The young lady says, "So would I, but I only get half an hour for lunch."

[gull12]

An old lady sits down at the same dining table with a young lady at an open cafeteria. After she finishes her meal, the younger lady lights up a cigarette and begins smoking it. The older lady says, "Well, I'd rather commit adultery than smoke a cigarette in public." The young lady says, "So would I, but I only get half an hour for lunch."

 

:lol:

[Tartanlad]

An old lady sits down at the same dining table with a young lady at an open cafeteria. After she finishes her meal, the younger lady lights up a cigarette and begins smoking it. The older lady says, "Well, I'd rather commit adultery than smoke a cigarette in public." The young lady says, "So would I, but I only get half an hour for lunch."

 

[Qengho]

Two women were on a commuter train to Boston. One turns to the other and asks, "Why are you going to the city today?"

 

"To get scrod," the other woman said.

 

"Me too," said the first, "but I didn't know that was the past tense."

[boxorox]

Guy from Boston sits next to a Texan on a long plane trip. Guy from Texas is full of stories about the great men of his state and their deeds. Finally the Bostonian is fed up and say's "We have our fair share of heroes in Boston, I'll have you know." Texan say's "Really? Tell me about one." Bostonian say's "Well... Therewas Paul Revere." Texan thinks a bit and say's "Hmmm... Paul Revere... Ain't he the fella that ran for help?"

[entertainment9]

 

Guy from Boston sits next to a Texan on a long plane trip. Guy from Texas is full of stories about the great men of his state and their deeds. Finally the Bostonian is fed up and say's "We have our fair share of heroes in Boston, I'll have you know." Texan say's "Really? Tell me about one." Bostonian say's "Well... Therewas Paul Revere." Texan thinks a bit and say's "Hmmm... Paul Revere... Ain't he the fella that ran for help?"

 

 

cute story