Members Deuterium Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 I posted this under another thread...but this may deserve its own. One of the greatest Harmony Central Amp reviews, ever.. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present you...the GORILLA GG-20: Price Paid: herd (bison) Features: 3 dual channels, separate eq for each. Power cut switch to cut the wattage in half when playing at home. MIDI in/out for outboard guitar synths. Pre and post gain "monkey head" knobs. Parallel effects loop, speaker out, etc. Sound Quality: 10 My guitar is red and has a hole in it by which it is connected to the Gorilla GG-20 by a wire. The sound is fantastic and accurately mimics the sound of an enraged ape. The clean channel is more spider monkey or maybe a gibbons. Crank the post gain a bit for a hint of howler monkeys in the middle of the night. Channel two is all sexually frustrated Willie B. silverback charging a safari camp on his knuckles in the mist. Stunning. Play it through a red guitar or maybe a light beige one to get the most out of this monster. I was not pleased when I first bought it but I pulled one of the preamp tubes out and now it sounds better. Much better in fact. Try sticking a pencil through the speaker a few times to release the beast within this baby. Reliability: 9 This amp will not turn on in the morning or in the heat of the day. Sometimes I hear Chinese radio signals coming from it. Longitudes and latitudes of American historical landmarks and things of that nature. The gorilla has another agenda which I do not fully understand. Occasionally the amp puts out a yellow smoke that smells of fresh mown hay and it is advisable to leave the room immediately. I would place my life in the hands of the Gorilla GG-20. If I were a fetus I would trust the Gorilla GG-20 to be my amniotic sac. I would kick and stretch my gorilla sac but it would never pop and spill me out. Customer Support: 6 I communicated with the Chinese factory by way of short wave H.A.M radio and Morse code. They told me that most replacement parts could be found in the radio I was using to communicate with them. They were the ones that suggested for me to pull the tubes out of the amp, and boy howdy, did that work. I pulled at least six tubes out of this thing and plugged the sockets with Play Dough. Thanks to those whacky Chinese engineers, I now can crank out the bitchin' sounds of Reb Beach, Nikki Sixx, and the Nelson bothers! I can also (with a little bit of tremolo and ring modulation) finally nail Stairway. Overall Rating: 6 I enjoy skee ball, water polo and severely depressing Russian novels of the late nineteenth century. I'm a Taurus with just a bit of a sweet tooth who worships his cat, Angus. Some people think I'm lazy, but I'm just a dreamer who loves stenciling and moonlit walks on the beach. I believe that the Gorilla is misunderstood as well. People think of it as some unattainable perfect entity when at heart it's human like the rest of us with faults and nervous ticks and bad days and uncontrollable urination in grocery stores. Just like us. Sometimes the Gorilla GG-20 tells me to kill people, but I know he's probably just kidding. Still, he's got some great points on a few things. Like how we both hate midgets and dwarves. I awoke one night to find my Gorilla GG-20 hovering above my bed chanting in Aramaic but I know he was doing it because he loves me and wants what's best for me. The Gorilla GG-20 has theories on the end of the world as well. It sounds as if it's not going to be as much fun as we had once thought. Fire and brimstone and gnashing of teeth. At least I'll have my Gorilla buddy and it's SRV on crack tone. :D Do not taunt the Gorilla amp Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Loghead Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 That brought a smile to my face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Kenny Powers Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 over premis was good, but honestly tried too hard. never left the reviewer guessing, which a true mock review would... see rip glitter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Hell Bites Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 Heh, that was great. That indeed left a smile on my face. How did you find that? (You didn't just go looking for gorilla amp reviews, did you? ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Deuterium Posted May 29, 2006 Author Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 Originally posted by Hell Bites Heh, that was great. That indeed left a smile on my face. How did you find that? (You didn't just go looking for gorilla amp reviews, did you? ) I actually had it saved on my hard drive for some time, now. I just remebered it, after someone posted a thread about nightmare amps, and the Gorilla was brought up. I can't recall how I originally came across the review, but it definitely wasn't because I was actually legitimately searching for reviews on Gorilla amps. I probably was bored, and was deliberately looking for some reviews on amps universally known to be crap, and stumbled upon this review, which really hit my funny bone. I liked it so much I copied it to a Word document and saved it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Hell Bites Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 Ah...I see. Don't you play crazy Yngwie Malmsteen type stuff? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Deuterium Posted May 29, 2006 Author Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 Originally posted by Hell Bites Ah...I see. Don't you play crazy Yngwie Malmsteen type stuff? Yes...and that's Yngwie J. Malmsteen:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Hell Bites Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 I don't suppose you've seen that full 30 minute video on Hear n Aid where at one point one of the guys from Spinal Tap talks about him? He makes a comment about that. Not to mention it has some sweet playing by Malmsteen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Deuterium Posted May 29, 2006 Author Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 Originally posted by Hell Bites I don't suppose you've seen that full 30 minute video on Hear n Aid where at one point one of the guys from Spinal Tap talks about him? He makes a comment about that. Not to mention it has some sweet playing by Malmsteen. No, I haven't seen that video. But the whole Yngwie J Malmsteen thing has been a running joke of Yngwie's for many years now. You can even see that he says it, with tongue firmly in cheek, in the old REH video of his from the 80's. Obviously...the joke being that it is so important to include the "J", so as not to confuse him with all the other Yngwie Malmsteens out there:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Deuterium Posted May 29, 2006 Author Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 Gorilla bump > Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members PGS412 Posted May 29, 2006 Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 I read this one on the reveiws section years ago but could never manage to find it again Thanks for posting it Im in tears after reading that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Deuterium Posted May 29, 2006 Author Members Share Posted May 29, 2006 ^ for the Labor Day crowd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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