Harmony Central Forums
Announcement Announcement Module
Collapse
No announcement yet.

Joke I just heard cracked me up bad!

Page Title Module
Move Remove Collapse









X
Conversation Detail Module
Collapse
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Joke I just heard cracked me up bad!

    I'm sure someone will say this is old and it probably is but it's still funny as hell.


    A train hits a bus load of Catholic school girls and they all perish. They
    are all in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates past St. Peter.
    St. Peter asks the first girl, "Gloria, have you ever had contact with a
    penis?" She giggles and shyly replies, "Well I once touched with the tip
    of my finger..." St. Peter says, "Ok, dip the tip of your finger in the holy
    water and pass through the gates."

    St. Peter asks the next girl the same question, "Catherine, have you ever
    had contact with a penis?" The girl is a little reluctant but replies,
    "Well once I fondled and stroked one." St. Peter says "OK, dip your whole hand in the holy water and pass through the gate."

    All of the sudden there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls, one
    girl is pushing her way to the front of the line. When she reaches the front of the line St. Peter says, "Lisa! What seems to be the rush?" The girl replies, "Well, If I'm going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I want to do it before Stephanie sticks her ass in it!
    GREAT TRANSACTIONS WITH.....---->CLICK HERE

  • #2
    Guitars:
    - ESP Original Forest GT
    - Edwards E-LP-98LTS
    - LTD M-1000
    - Seagull S6

    Amp:
    - Mesa/Boogie Mark IV

    Effects:
    - Maxon OD808
    - MXR Smart gate
    - MXR Carbon copy
    - TC Electronic Hall of Fame
    - TC Electronic Polytune

    Comment


    • #3
      old.

      [COLOR="white"]actually I've never heard that one
      GIBSON | PRS | SQUIER | EPIPHONE | BLACKSTAR | PEAVEY | MARSHALL | JET CITY | CRATE (ZOMG!!!)

      The Band

      Good Transactions







      Originally Posted by Ovid9


      I thought it was more the fact your walls were covered in pictures of skinny guys with long hair.

      How did you fap in a room like that?



      Proud owner of the first NAD of the new HC

      Comment


      • #4
        old.

        funny, but old
        got a question about TITAN amps? ask me
        here

        my website

        TITAN AMPS on myspace


        My band:Last Comes Gunfire

        Comment


        • #5
          Before Stephanie sticks her ass in it? Hmm...Catholic school girls....hey...hey wait a minute. Curtis' hair gel story?!!?
          Originally Posted by wiseblood


          I have been to jail in tijuana. Twice.





          Originally Posted by isvoid


          you missed him didn't you













          Originally Posted by Sweep?


          Sock filled with soap, hit, concussion, brain damage, body bag, car, cornfield, funeral. In that order.

          Comment


          • #6
            My fav:

            Adam and Eve are in the garden of Eden, and Adam is fretting over Eve's first period.

            Adam: God, she's bleeding, what do I do?
            God: What have you done so far?
            Adam: I sent her to the river to clean up
            God: You shouldn't have done that Adam
            Adam: Why not?
            God: Well, I can get the blood out of the water, but I'll never get the smell out of the fish!
            Spam'o'matic:

            Nothing!

            Comment


            • #7
              Good deals with: the avenger, Zepsongs, BryanFTWL, gibbyshibby, marshmi, Ovid9, emptyparadigm, thesockmonster, Krunch79, VoodooChild24, espdna, StopReferencing, mhn433, NixerX, Mood Sphinx, itkindaworks, SomeDayRockstar, guller1, metz420(TGP)

              Comment


              • #8


                I am archiving your fail for all to see. No Ninja lows edit can save you now!
                Originally Posted by wiseblood


                I have been to jail in tijuana. Twice.





                Originally Posted by isvoid


                you missed him didn't you













                Originally Posted by Sweep?


                Sock filled with soap, hit, concussion, brain damage, body bag, car, cornfield, funeral. In that order.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I am archiving your fail for all to see. No Ninja lows edit can save you now!


                  Damn, you caught me not knowing how to imbed a video in the new system the first time I tried to do it. You got me, man.
                  Good deals with: the avenger, Zepsongs, BryanFTWL, gibbyshibby, marshmi, Ovid9, emptyparadigm, thesockmonster, Krunch79, VoodooChild24, espdna, StopReferencing, mhn433, NixerX, Mood Sphinx, itkindaworks, SomeDayRockstar, guller1, metz420(TGP)

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Damn, you caught me not knowing how to imbed a video in the new system the first time I tried to do it. You got me, man.


                    As if it was different with the old system.
                    PRS, Godin, Carvin, & Ibanez guitars
                    Digitech GSP1101/Control 2
                    Sennheiser G2 in-ear system









                    Originally Posted by DrakkarTyrannis


                    Ya'll n****s is gay

                    Cheers, Lucius.









                    Originally Posted by BrendanO


                    For real. Anomaly shreds not only his balls off, but the balls off two out of every five children born after 1992.



                    Band
                    YouTube
                    Facebook

                    Transactions with: OceansBetweenUs, eagertokill, rbasaria, outkastin2g, jonny_toetags, Findthetone, chriscnb, and CAC

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Your double fail has now been archived.
                      Originally Posted by wiseblood


                      I have been to jail in tijuana. Twice.





                      Originally Posted by isvoid


                      you missed him didn't you













                      Originally Posted by Sweep?


                      Sock filled with soap, hit, concussion, brain damage, body bag, car, cornfield, funeral. In that order.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        As if it was different with the old system.


                        The old system was different. And better. (Not really, but hey)

                        Now the old as dirt system (say, pre July of 2010 since I have no knowledge of such time and it may not exist as such) maybe was the same.
                        Originally Posted by TheEternal


                        Can't you just let Jesus melt your face?









                        Originally Posted by Neilrocks25


                        life's too short not to eat bee's




                        Good Transactions

                        Peavey Bravo 112, Acoustic Control Corp 150 (x2), Peavey VTM120, Mesa Metal Grille Halfback 2x12, Tubeworks vert 2x12, Peavey 1810
                        Godin SD24, Squier Standard Strat, Ibanez "Millenium" Destroyer, Agile 3100, Squier Classic Vibe Tele, Peavey Reactor

                        Fix Congress First

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          My fav:

                          Adam and Eve are in the garden of Eden, and Adam is fretting over Eve's first period.

                          Adam: God, she's bleeding, what do I do?
                          God: What have you done so far?
                          Adam: I sent her to the river to clean up
                          God: You shouldn't have done that Adam
                          Adam: Why not?
                          God: Well, I can get the blood out of the water, but I'll never get the smell out of the fish!


                          LOOOL

                          my turn... might be lame, but i laugh with the stupidest ****************/fart related jokes

                          Today at Mass, while the Priest was giving out the communion, out of nowhere all the nuns started to laugh hysterically. So, the Mother Superior commands all 30 nuns to go and confess. And so they go to the priest to do so...
                          Nun 1: Forgive me Father for i have sinned. I laughed during mass.
                          Priest: It's ok my child, just don't do it again...
                          Nun 2: Forgive me Father for i have sinned. I laughed during mass.
                          Priest: It's ok my child, just don't do it again...
                          Nun 3: Forgive me Father for i have sinned. I laughed during mass.
                          Priest: It's ok my child, just don't do it again...
                          Nun 5: Forgive me Father for i have sinned. I laughed during mass.
                          Priest: It's ok my child, just don't do it again...
                          Nun 8: Forgive me Father for i have sinned. I laughed during mass.
                          Priest: It's ok my child, just don't do it again...
                          Nun 14: Forgive me Father for i have sinned. I laughed during mass.
                          Priest: It's ok my child, just don't do it again...
                          and so on... But the Father was tired of this silly joke...

                          Nun 30: Forgive me Father for I have sinned..
                          Father: I KNOOOW, I KNOOOOOOW , you laughed during mass...
                          Nun 30: No Father, i was the one who Farted!!!


                          Jackson RR3
                          Jackson DK2M
                          LTD MH-400
                          LTD M-350
                          Dean Zx- in pieces
                          Framus Cobra
                          Peavey 5150
                          Carvin Legacy 4x12

                          Excellent Transactions








                          Originally Posted by Spaced Out Ace


                          I have three Ltd's and can stroke the guitar necks like the male co-star in a porno about to blow his load. I don't find them to be sharp.









                          Originally Posted by ~Abstract~


                          "I'll buy your guitar...but I'm gonna need to take about 5 bucks off for the Lysol I'll need to disinfect it."



                          Member of the HCAF SS

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            A Minister, a priest and a rabbi are having their Thursday night poker session when they get busted by the vice squad. the cops seperate them into different corners of the room and start their interrogation.
                            "Father, tell me, were you gambling for money?" The priest says a hasty prayer of absolution for himself and replies "No".

                            "Mr Smith, were you gambling for money?" The minister whispers a quick prayer to Jesus asking to be forgiven, and replies "No".

                            "Rabbi, were you gambling for money?"

                            "With who?" He answers.
                            Originally Posted By Trace-P38
                            Flogger wins.








                            Originally Posted by Uma Floresta View Post
                            Because we floggers won the music war some time ago.








                            Originally Posted by Mike Riley View Post
                            Preaching to the choir Rush in on a whole different level to quote a movie You might listen to Rush but you cant here Rush



                            http://www.box.net/shared/x85lhnst14

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"














                              Originally Posted by nightflameauto


                              You'd think the guy that argues faith as logic would let us all believe in the unicorn.









                              Originally Posted by draelyc


                              None of you understand. I'm not locked up in here posting to you. You're locked up in here posting to me.









                              Originally Posted by LoopQuantum


                              I'm helping you, for the future. This way, instead of humping life's doorknobs, you'll perhaps someday open one.









                              Originally Posted by nightflameauto


                              Hardvalve is like Nelo without the class or intelligence.
                              Think about that and try not to get an aneurysm from it.




                              BLOG!
                              TUNES!

                              Comment



                              Working...
                              X