Members Rcpd0715 Posted December 18, 2015 Members Share Posted December 18, 2015 Hey guys, here is a very rough version of a new song I'm working on...please let me know what you think. this is actually my newest newest version (12-17-15) with some changes https://soundcloud.c...you-new-version I need you I'm alone, It's dark in hereWhere are you, there's so much fearI don't know what to doHelp me God, I need you Help me up, hear my shoutBe my light, guide me outI need your strength, I need your loveI tried myself, it's not enough Pre-chorus:You are with meEverything's okayYou're behind meNothing can get in my way Chorus:I was aloneBut you found meYou stood me upfrom my kneesI needed youYou set me free I hear your voice, feel you nearMy hand is out, there goes my fearHere we go, we're headed outI see a light, there goes my doubt Calmness comes, it feels me upIt's warm here now, there's so much loveIt's amazing, I'm with youI'm not alone, I have you Pre-chorus repeat Chorus repeat I needed you, you set me free (several times to the end) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members highmtn Posted December 19, 2015 Members Share Posted December 19, 2015 @Rcpd0715, It's sounding good, overall. Personally, I think the chorus needs a little more direction. It's not bad, but maybe you should just play the chords and hum the melody and see if maybe you can make it turn around a little more logically...? It kind of hangs there a little. Seriously, I'm not being critical, I just think that chordally or melodically it could use a little turn there in about the third line of the main chorus. See if maybe you might want to adjust that ever-so-slightly. Bob Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rcpd0715 Posted December 19, 2015 Author Members Share Posted December 19, 2015 @Rcpd0715, It's sounding good, overall. Personally, I think the chorus needs a little more direction. It's not bad, but maybe you should just play the chords and hum the melody and see if maybe you can make it turn around a little more logically...? It kind of hangs there a little. Seriously, I'm not being critical, I just think that chordally or melodically it could use a little turn there in about the third line of the main chorus. See if maybe you might want to adjust that ever-so-slightly. Bob i agree with you Bob, I am gonna try to change it up a bit, thank you for the response! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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