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  • Holy crap, I live in the ghetto!

    So me and my bro just moved into this awesome little house on the east side of Austin. Our house is brand new and absolutely beautiful, the neighborhood however... not so much. For starters theres a crack head named Mike who likes to bug us and tell us all about the ghetto activities down the street. The other day Mike tells us that a man had sold a guy some crack then returned an hour later with a gun and robbed the guy, yesterday that dealer got shot and is in critical condition.

    I thought austin was full of hippies! When did this happen
    http://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/je...414999790?uo=4

    http://www.ilike.com/artist/Jerad+Laxson

    http://www.amazon.com/Jerad-Laxson-E...8142991&sr=8-1

  • #2
    There's only one thing to do and that is...


    Originally Posted by braif


    We need a multi-linqual international special STFU liaison officer around here

    Comment


    • #3
      There's only one thing to do and that is...




      smoke crack
      Hail Homer! Blessed is he among men and blessed is the fruit of his loins Bart.

      Comment


      • #4
        Look on teh bright side, now you have "street cred" and can release your rap album.
        My sister-in-law is a were-lion that lives in a tool shed.







        Originally Posted by f o r k t o o l


        Do you fear God when he says you butt****************ers will go to hell?









        Originally Posted by blackpig


        If I ever have the misfortune to be introduced to Julie Andrews I will take great pleasure in giving her a resounding kick in the ****.









        Originally Posted by Nero666


        Nice work God!!!! You ****************ed me again!!!!



        Proud Member of THE FELLOWSHIP OF TEH BAG - Poast 1000 Champion

        + bring amber lamps +

        Comment


        • #5
          There's only one thing to do and that is...




          Hell yeah. You don't want that scum hanging around yer pad. Just watch from your locked doors and windows. If you don't have a gun, now's a good time to get one. I used to answer the door with a pistol behind my back when I wasn't expecting company.

          Comment


          • #6
            What is the ratio of pitbulls to other dogs in the neighbourhood?
            "I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts." - John Steinbeck

            Comment


            • #7
              I've lived in the country my entire life, the only thing we have to watch out for is the occasional raccoon or wild boar.
              http://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/je...414999790?uo=4

              http://www.ilike.com/artist/Jerad+Laxson

              http://www.amazon.com/Jerad-Laxson-E...8142991&sr=8-1

              Comment


              • #8
                What is the ratio of pitbulls to other dogs in the neighbourhood?


                That, and are there groups of non-white people standing around doing nothing?

                Comment


                • #9
                  I use to sit on my roof with a hunting rifle just waiting, WAITING for someone to litter on mah block!!!!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    That, and are there groups of non-white people standing around doing nothing?


                    Oh yes all the time.
                    http://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/je...414999790?uo=4

                    http://www.ilike.com/artist/Jerad+Laxson

                    http://www.amazon.com/Jerad-Laxson-E...8142991&sr=8-1

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      How do people buy homes like this and act surprized later? Did the realtors blindfold you and then drive you to the house?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        How do people buy homes like this and act surprized later? Did the realtors blindfold you and then drive you to the house?


                        +6141235659724

                        how in the world do you NOT know your new pad is in the ghetto?

                        if you just bought the house, sell it.

                        if your renting, move out.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Verse One: Ice Cube

                          Straight outta Compton, crazy mother****************er named Ice Cube
                          From the gang called OJaz With Attitudes
                          When I'm called off, I got a sawed off
                          Squeeze the trigger, and bodies are hauled off
                          You too, boy, if ya **************** with me
                          The police are gonna hafta come and get me
                          Off yo ass, that's how I'm goin out
                          For the punk mother****************ers that's showin out
                          OJaz start to mumble, they wanna rumble
                          Mix em and cook em in a pot like gumbo
                          Goin off on a mother****************er like that
                          with a gat that's pointed at yo ass
                          So give it up smooth
                          Ain't no tellin when I'm down for a jack move
                          Here's a murder rap to keep yo dancin
                          with a crime record like Charles Manson
                          AK-47 is the tool
                          Don't make me act the mother****************in fool
                          Me you can go toe to toe, no maybe
                          I'm knockin OJaz out tha box, daily
                          yo weekly, monthly and yearly
                          until them dumb mother****************ers see clearly
                          that I'm down with the capital C-P-T
                          Boy you can't **************** with me
                          So when I'm in your neighborhood, you better duck
                          Coz Ice Cube is crazy as ****************
                          As I leave, believe I'm stompin
                          but when I come back, boy, I'm comin straight outta Compton

                          Chorus:

                          [City of Compton, City of Compton]

                          [Eazy E] Yo Ren
                          [MC Ren] Whassup?
                          [Eazy E] Tell em where you from!

                          Verse Two: MC Ren

                          Straight outta Compton, another crazy ass OJa
                          More punks I smoke, yo, my rep gets bigger
                          I'm a bad mother****************er and you know this
                          But the ******************** ass OJaz don't show this
                          But I don't give a ****************, I'ma make my snaps
                          If not from the records, from jackin the crops
                          Just like burglary, the definition is 'jackin'
                          And when illegally armed it's called 'packin'
                          Shoot a mother****************er in a minute
                          I find a good piece o' ********************, I go up in it
                          So if you're at a show in the front row
                          I'm a call you a bitch or dirty-ass ho
                          You'll probably get mad like a bitch is supposed to
                          But that shows me, slut, you're composed to
                          a crazy mutha****************er from tha street
                          Attitude legit cause I'm tearin up ****************
                          MC Ren controls the automatic
                          For any dumb mutha****************er that starts static
                          Not the right hand cause I'm the hand itself
                          every time I pull a AK off the shelf
                          The security is maximum and that's a law
                          R-E-N spells Ren but I'm raw
                          See, coz I'm the mother****************in villain
                          The definition is clear, you're the witness of a killin
                          that's takin place without a clue
                          And once you're on the scope, your ass is through
                          Look, you might take it as a trip
                          but a OJa like Ren is on a gangsta tip
                          Straight outta Compton...

                          Chorus:

                          [City of Compton, City of Compton]

                          [Dr. Dre] Eazy is his name and the boy is comin...

                          Verse Three: Eazy-E

                          ...straight outta Compton
                          is a brotha that'll smother yo' mother
                          and make ya sister think I love her
                          Dangerous mother****************er raises hell
                          And if I ever get caught I make bail
                          See, I don't give a ****************, that's the problem
                          I see a mother****************in cop I don't dodge him
                          But I'm smart, lay low, creep a while
                          And when I see a punk pass, I smile
                          To me it's kinda funny, the attitude showin a nigga drivin
                          but don't know where the **************** he's going, just rollin
                          lookin for the one they call Eazy
                          But here's a flash, they never seize me
                          Ruthless! Never seen like a shadow in the dark
                          except when I unload, see I'll get over the hesitation
                          and hear the scream of the one who got the last penetration
                          Give a little gust of wind and I'm jettin
                          But leave a memory no one'll be forgettin
                          So what about the bitch who got shot? **************** her!
                          You think I give a damn about a bitch? I ain't a sucka!
                          This is the autobiography of the E, and if you ever **************** with me
                          You'll get taken by a stupid dope brotha who will smother
                          word to the mother****************er, straight outta Compton

                          Chorus:

                          [City of Compton, City of Compton]

                          [And that kind of **************** you cant sweep up under no rug you know]
                          My sister-in-law is a were-lion that lives in a tool shed.







                          Originally Posted by f o r k t o o l


                          Do you fear God when he says you butt****************ers will go to hell?









                          Originally Posted by blackpig


                          If I ever have the misfortune to be introduced to Julie Andrews I will take great pleasure in giving her a resounding kick in the ****.









                          Originally Posted by Nero666


                          Nice work God!!!! You ****************ed me again!!!!



                          Proud Member of THE FELLOWSHIP OF TEH BAG - Poast 1000 Champion

                          + bring amber lamps +

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Racist!


                            I think I'm gonna watch me some dirty movies....and have Cheetos for breakfast

                            -Cee Gee


                            Lo, there do I see my father
                            Lo, there do I see my mother and my sisters and my brothers
                            Lo, there do I see the line of my people back to the beginning
                            Lo, they do call to me
                            They bid me take my place among them in the Halls of Valhalla
                            Where the brave may live.
                            Forever.......**************** SALT!!!!

                            www.theopenjam.net

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              +6141235659724

                              how in the world do you NOT know your new pad is in the ghetto?

                              if you just bought the house, sell it.

                              if your renting, move out.


                              My brother is the one who decided to rent it, I hadn't even seen it before I moved in. Trust me when I say this house is absolutely amazing! It's a $300,000 home, the only thing wrong with it is it's location. However if was in a nicer neighborhood I'm sure the rent would be out of our price range.

                              you can check out the house here...
                              http://www.brianeddins.com/listings/D575E996-E688-6141-56B4CFED5EBE7E27.shtml
                              http://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/je...414999790?uo=4

                              http://www.ilike.com/artist/Jerad+Laxson

                              http://www.amazon.com/Jerad-Laxson-E...8142991&sr=8-1

                              Comment



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