To the avarge Eurosissyfag, a cigarette can be described colloquially by utilising a word that starts with the letter F and ends with the letter G; the little etymological train stops on its way to pick up the letter A which happily takes a seat between the other two.
There is also a word used by us Eurosissyfags to describe either a bundle of twigs tied ready to be used as kindling or a delicious type of meatball beloved by the working classes in the North of England. I refer, of course, to the delicasy beginning with the letter F followed by an A and then swiftly passed by two Gs after which, without so much as a pause for breath, there follows the letter O and then, by way of a denoument, a T.
Both of these words seem to be out of favour with the powers that be here at the moment. I beg for their reinstatement in the lexicon as there absence renders any meaningful conversation here somewhat strained.
I think it's all a load of bollix myself.