I don't much care for it. I think I may have figured out why.
You see, I don't know how to get old. I don't know who I'm supposed to be. I don't really want to stop having sex, though that decision seems to have mostly been made for me. I don't want to stop eating, but it seems I have to slow down tremendously. I feel as though I'm eating only half of what I used to, or less, yet I'm gaining weight. Same with drinking. Even playing gigs kicks my ass in ways it never did before.
But what to do? When I was young, there seemed to be an old person lifestyle, that one could ease into, playing bridge or pinochle with friends, watching the game on weekends (whichever game happened to be on), spoiling the grandchildren, and so on. None of those seem like viable options to me at this point. Maybe I shouldn't have quit working, I dunno.