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NEW BILL INTRODUCED IN CONGRESS

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  • NEW BILL INTRODUCED IN CONGRESS

    Maybe they're moving on from the dead gun control issue...

     

     

    President Barack Hussein Obama II and the Democratic Senate are considering sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits for many Americans. The Americans With No Abilities Act is being hailed as a major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack any real skills or ambition.

    "Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society," said California Senator Barbara Boxer. "We can no longer stand by and allow People of Inability (POI) to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group of workers, simply because they have some idea of what they are doing."


    In a Capitol Hill press conference, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pointed to the success of the U.S. Postal Service, which has a long-standing policy of providing opportunity without regard to performance. At the state government level, the Department of Motor Vehicles also has an excellent record of hiring Persons with No Ability (63 percent).

    Under the Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million mid-level positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and performance.

    Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given to guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees. The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that promote a significant number of Persons of Inability (POI) into middle-management positions, and give a tax credit to small and medium-sized businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

    Finally, the Americans With No Abilities Act contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the non-abled, banning, for example, discriminatory interview questions such as, "Do you have any skills or experience that relate to this job?"

    "As a non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who have something going for them," said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her position as a lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint, Mich., due to her inability to remember righty tighty, lefty loosey. "This new law should be real good for people like me. I

    No one cares about your stage stuff.

  • #2

    Der! DUH DER DUH!!! DOODELY DOODELY DOO! DER! DUMB DUH DER! 

     

    :catsurprised:

    __________________________________________________ _____

    Here's what I did today: https://matthewsams.wordpress.com

    Here's my music: http://mattsams.bandcamp.com

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    • Belva
      Belva commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey, Mr Nice Guy, ****************u!

  • #3
    If there's a new bill introduced in Congress, you can be sure the Republicans won't pay it. Then they'll blame Obama when the interest far exceeds the principle.
    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ______________
    How Come Other People Can Get Away With Jokes Like That?

    Face it Tea Bagging Neo-Cons...if Reagan ran today, you'd be calling him a RINO socialist! -- scott666

    Barack Obama must be kenyan - everytime he speaks they trot a translator out the next day to explain what he said.-- ToBeAnnounced

    And even then some people still don't understand.-- RogueGnome

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  • #4
    "Senator **bleep** Durbin"

    Priceless!
    gp

    'Gentlemen, please. Rest your sphincters.' --Hedley Lamarr

    The above is not to be taken too seriously.

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