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Things people say to musicians that they should'nt

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  • Things people say to musicians that they should'nt

    Here is some things people say to musicians that they should'nt. Please feel free to share any remarks that you have heard that get under your skin. I am sure you guys have some good ones. Here are some that I have heard lately. I shows how ignorant people are that do the booking or hire bands to -play:

    "Is the band going to be loud?"
    "Why do you need 20 amp circuits?"
    "Why can't the speakers go on the wet grass?"
    "Do you really need all those cables to play?"
    <div class="signaturecontainer">&quot;Danny, ci manchi a tutti. La E-Street Band non e' la stessa senza di te. Riposa in pace, fratello&quot;</div>

  • #2
    my friend that is with me is an awesome guitar player, you should let him play a song!

    can you play mustang sally?

    can you play brown eyed girl?

    do i have to pay a cover? i promise i will dance every song!

    we are not worried about the rain.

    do you play any country songs?

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    • #3
      "All you guys need a microphone?!?" (soundguys)

      "Dude, do you guys do any _________? (insert name of any band that is the complete opposite of what we do)"

      "Xjkhddd heruiryf kjsf khjstyy sh w jfksw ljsfjf" (which is about what I hear when people try to talk to me in the middle of a song)
      <div class="signaturecontainer">--------------------------------------------------<br />
      <font size="2">anonymous HC review - &quot;<i>this amp produced a distorted sound that is most comparable to a frightened duck trying to quack its way out from an aluminum foil cage</i>&quot;</font></div>

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      • #4
        "I had you down for next Friday."
        <div class="signaturecontainer">&quot;Southern Rock is in the ear of the beer holder&quot;<br />
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        • #5
          Do you guys know "Jerimiah Was A Bullfrog" ?
          "Oh God, do you have to use amplifiers ?
          It's not raining, only some thunder & lightening!! Do you have to stop?
          <div class="signaturecontainer">&quot;I Want To Soak Up The SUNN !! &quot;<br />
          <br />
          Trying to &quot;shred&quot; it [Comfortably Numb] is like painting a mustache on the Mona Lisa <b>- babalugats85 -</b><br />
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          &quot;Fat girls are like mopeds. They're lots of fun 'til your friends see you on one&quot;<br />
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          • #6
            "I'm gonna have you guys setup in the corner" while pointing to a 5' X 5' area sandwiched between a pool table and a popcorn machine.
            <div class="signaturecontainer"><u><b>Guitars</b></u>Wolfgang Standard, Edwards E-LP-85CD, Wolf 540TM <u><b>Amps</b></u> Bogner XTC 101B, Blackstar HT5-H, Marshall 1960A, Marshall 1960B 'custom' <u><b>Effects</b></u>G Major, Bad Horsie, DMC Ground Control<br />
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            • #7
              [QUOTE=Hamer_Time;28845819
              "Dude, do you guys do any _________? (insert name of any band that is the complete opposite of what we do)"......yeah usually from someone who's just walked into the bar at the end of the evening whilst we're packing up!


              What about

              "I've never played a (insert name of your toe curlingly expensive guitar/bass etc) Can I have a go?....i'll be careful"

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              • #8
                is there a band here tonight ? --- while your loading in?

                are you setting up or tearing down -- (it's 8pm)

                are you guys in the band?

                where is the DJ that is usually here?

                is one outlet enough? the DJ only uses one outlet!

                can i see your guitar?

                can I see your song list? (never give anyone your song list)

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                • #9
                  Could you super-size that?
                  <div class="signaturecontainer"><a target="_blank" href="http://www.tauntr.com/">Tauntr.com - Adding Insult to Everything!</a><br><br><br><br>Neck Pocket Cavern Surveyor for the <font color="Red">Rhythm in Jump. Dancing Close to You</font> club!<br><br><br><br>&quot;In all fairness, Les Pauls have a switch position labeled &quot;Rhythm&quot;, while Strats do not, because they are lead guitars for lead guitarists.&quot; -Flatspotter</div>

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                  • #10
                    "You can't go on break! We just got here!"

                    OR...alternatively...the traveling bridal party:

                    "You can't go on break! We have to get on the bus and leave in 20 minutes!"

                    Yeah...really makes me want to re-arrange the entire night to please a pack of drunken women who will be gone in 15 minutes...
                    <div class="signaturecontainer"><div class="bbcode_container">
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                    <img src="images/misc/quote_icon.png" alt="Quote" /> Originally Posted by <strong>caveman</strong>
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                    <div class="message">I'll bend over backwards to make things work but I'll be damned if I'll bend over forwards.</div>

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                    </div> <a href="http://www.michaelmenege.com" target="_blank">Digital Me</a></div>

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                    • #11
                      Things people have actually said to me or my band:

                      "Damn, I thought this was karaoke night."
                      "Y'all look like you're gonna be loud."
                      "Don't touch that flag! I fought for that flag!" (When our drummer moved a U.S. flag out of the way while running our snake.)
                      "Sorry, we're double-booked. We'll have to re-schedule y'all." (Why don't they ever have to re-schedule the OTHER band?!?)
                      <div class="signaturecontainer">&quot;Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence.&quot; (Robert Fripp)</div>

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                      • #12
                        "I'm gonna have you guys setup in the corner" while pointing to a 5' X 5' area sandwiched between a pool table and a popcorn machine.


                        I play in a restaurant once a month where the area we set up is about that same size or somewhat smaller. The band is an upright bass player and two guitars. The area is between two doors. I spend alot of time moving my guitar so folks won't walk into it. But the gig pays surprisingly well.

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                        • #13
                          How about these...
                          "So do you think you're going to 'make it' and become a big star?" - that's so complex I don't even want to open that diabolical can of worms with people. I need a cool beverage, comfortable chair, and at least 10 minutes to do that.

                          "Dude, you're a badass guitarist. So what type of amp and effects are you running?" - After immediately finishing a set, this is one of the last things I want to hear. You wanna talk about my equipment? Please do after I've gotten off the stage and given the other band an opportunity to set up.
                          <div class="signaturecontainer">Shot From Guns<br />
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                          &quot;Business acumen, institution building, and shrewd political maneuvering are the only way to protect conscious artistry.&quot;<br />
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                          &quot;The more fragile harmonics can survive in a vacuum tube, where they seem to be eliminated or squashed in the solid state crystal lattice. Maybe it just comes down to that.&quot; - the wise Alexander Dumble</div>

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                          • #14
                            Wow! You guys sure have a lot of equipment, do you really need all those speakers?

                            Max
                            <div class="signaturecontainer">What Me Worry?<br />
                            <a href="http://www.hotboxrox.com/" target="_blank">http://www.hotboxrox.com/</a></div>

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                            • #15
                              "You're almost as good as Eric Clapton."

                              Back handed compliment?
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                              <img src="images/misc/quote_icon.png" alt="Quote" /> Originally Posted by <strong>richierobins</strong>
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                              <div class="message">Mistaking a fanny for an arse is probably the reason behind their obsession with SIIHP.</div>

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