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  • Children in bars... 2 stories

    Anyone feel a bit uncomfortable when there are children (for whatever reason) in a bar when you start playing? I am not talking about places that are primarily restaurants, we have done many shows like that. Usually early gigs or summer time out door patio type gigs. I mean places that- although they may serve food to 11pm the dining atmosphere is not there. (you know, with the live music and car bombs galore after 9pm)

    Last night a couple (looked to be early 30s) and two of their friends came in just as were were about to start with two girls maybe 8 and 10 years old. Sat at a table right next to the dance floor. Needless to say the only ones up dancing to our 1st set were the 2 little girls. And they were dancing like crazy! Mom and dad didn't move form their table full of drinks as the little girls ran around the dance floor. You can see our crowd cautiously staying clear of the children. After mom and dad and pals slammed a few drinks down and the 1st set was over they were all gone and everything went back to normal but I couldn't help thinking this got our night off to a bad start. It could have went south fast IMO.

    I was told by a bunch of girls that came out to see us they couldn't get "into it" and let loose because of the two little girls dancing around. 

    This wasn't too bad of an experience compared to the other one I witnessed with young kids...

    A different venue a few years back. Same kind of deal, Mom, dad, two kids maybe 8 & 10- but Mom and dad got HAMMERED!!! When patrons complained the bar manager defended the parents saying they DUMPED $200 on dinner and drinks! And she won't be kicking them out! 

    That turned ugly as the Mom got nasty with with some of our crowd and the band stopped and the kids were in the middle of it all... Ugh. Police came and who knows what happened after that....

     

    Just some thoughts on a Sunday morning. 

     

    www.ostrichhat.com

  • #2

    As a parent - I shake my head when I see kids in bars under what I consider inappropriate situations (...stragglers left from the dinner crowd is one thing - the "we brought the kids to the bar ...." scenario is another!). 

    If we've got kids in the house inappropriately - we still do the show we came to do.  We don't change a thing ... including language.   The sad reality is that the kids who are present in situations like that are the victims of parents who are thorough idiots.   Changing up the show I was hired to perform to avoid "ruining" kids who are there in an inappropriate situation won't do a thing for them - their idiot parents will have either screwed them up before they brought them in -or- will screw the poor kids up after they've left.   Most likely - the poor kids are getting screwed up by their idiot parents constantly.   The couple of hours of bad language, irresponsible alcohol use, sexual innuendo and adult humor that they may be exposed to during my band's performance is but a drop in the bucket to the mess that their idiot parents are exposing them too. 

    As a bandleader - I take the position that I'm responsible for the musicians and whatever goes on onstage - period.   I'm not responsible for anybody's behavior in the house.   I don't accept any responsibility when a bar owner tries to give me the "he's part of your crowd line.   I don't explain the bar owner's enforcement / lack of enforcement of whatever rules do or should apply.   I smile and play my notes as best I can - and look to my bandmates to do the same thing.   Whatever happens on the other side of the magic line between stage and the house is the bar owner's headache.  Period.

    The SpaceNorman

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    Comment


    • jeff42
      jeff42 commented
      Editing a comment

      SpaceNorman wrote:

      As a parent - I shake my head when I see kids in bars under what I consider inappropriate situations (...stragglers left from the dinner crowd is one thing - the "we brought the kids to the bar ...." scenario is another!). 

       

       

      Both situations were "We brought kids to the bar. " The 2nd situation was WAY worse than the 1st one i described cuz these idiots were there drinking from when we were setting up (around 8pm) to after our 1st set (around 10:30pm) 

      We do a pretty clean show so we don't really need to change ever. Sure we skip a few nasty lyrics but other than that nothing is different. 


    • FitchFY
      FitchFY commented
      Editing a comment

      SpaceNorman wrote:

      If we've got kids in the house inappropriately - we still do the show we came to do.  We don't change a thing ... including language.   The sad reality is that the kids who are present in situations like that are the victims of parents who are thorough idiots.   ..... 

      As a bandleader - I take the position that I'm responsible for the musicians and whatever goes on onstage - period.   I'm not responsible for anybody's behavior in the house.   I don't accept any responsibility when a bar owner tries to give me the "he's part of your crowd line.   I don't explain the bar owner's enforcement / lack of enforcement of whatever rules do or should apply.  

       

      Well said, Norman! What bar let a couple of kids in? That gets you shut down in Massachusetts...



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