Members ski219 Posted April 14, 2015 Members Share Posted April 14, 2015 OK at 58 I admit I'm a bit old for this shyte....but here goes. So I haven't been posting much (has anybody though) but I am looking for some advice on which way to turn. For the past year I have been working on putting together a cover band and we have been gigging sporadically, not in the best rooms and not for the best $, though we are pretty good and have fun. However, the bassist and drummer have issues and I am tired of trying to keep the whole thing together and moving forward. Yes I volunteered to be band leader. So if I keep this band together my plan is to replace both the drummer and bassist. Girl singer and other guitarist are with me here as they are also tired of the drama and shenanigans. Now ,just when I am getting messages from drummer, you know the drill, "I can't play with_____ It's either him or me and we can get another bass player easily..." yadda yadda. A singer I was in a successful cover band with a few years back texts me to ask if I want to replace the lead guitar in his popular modern country band. This is a chance for me to step into a regularly gigging band with a following that plays some good rooms as well as community events and state fair type gigs. So my thoughts are all over the place: Do I stick with the band I have and try to make it work? Do I play stuff I mostly don't like in order to gig and make some decent extra cash? Or do I start over and put together a band that just plays stuff I really like: Bluegrass, Dead, Stones, mix of acoustic and electric. This last option would be the most fun for me. My current cover band would be #2 in the fun factor. And, finally, the modern country act would be the easiest and most financially rewarding. As you can see from my forum name I am into skiing. In the past I have used my guitar hobby to pay for my skiing habit and that has always made me feel good. Just mentioning this as it impacts my decision, knowing that I can instantly be banking some play money by playing modern country... If only it were outlaw country I would join in a second! Please, you few forum members still around, help me think this through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members StratGuy22 Posted April 14, 2015 Members Share Posted April 14, 2015 I've always found it easier to join something that's going on than building something of my own. Myself, I'd join the country band. Leave the drama behind, get out there and make some money. You can have fun playing music you aren't crazy about. Maybe they'd be open to doing some bluegrass numbers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members the_big_e Posted April 15, 2015 Members Share Posted April 15, 2015 Is it a job or a hobby. If a job then you make more $ by doing what the customer wants and putting up with the brown stuff, even if it's not what you want. If it's a hobby with the bonus of a bit of $ on the side then hobbies are supposed to be fun (in some way at least). If what you are doing is a not fun and whatever you are getting out of it does not offset that then it's time to move on.Doing your own thing is fine, be it covers, originals or whatever but you have to accept the possibility of lower income so I'd say the first step is to figure out what you want out of it, then go from there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members abzurd Posted April 15, 2015 Members Share Posted April 15, 2015 What do you want and what do you need? If you truly need the cash then it's the country band. Case closed. I'm guessing that's not the case as you sound smart enough to figure that out. So next look at why you play out? If you fancy yourself a performer and entertainer and are playing with other competent musicians, then there's nothing wrong with the material you're playing being a secondary consideration. That's the situation for me. If I never play "Funky Music" again, I'd be happy, but I do enjoy watching people knock over chairs getting to the dance floor when we start playing it and the people watching that follows. If you couldn't care less when, or even if, you play out, then play what you want with who you want. As for the current situation, unless you're really into the business part and are good at it, I'd consider blowing it up. Do you really want to be the leader of a band? If so, do you want to inherit one that that A) you're going to have to find replacements for half of, B) not super duper passionate about the material and C) Have to retool "something" to get into better places ... and foster those relationships. That could take years unless you happen to find replacement musicians that have venue connections. There's my 2 cents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ggm1960 Posted April 17, 2015 Members Share Posted April 17, 2015 It's a no brainer. You're 58, go with the group with the good gigs. Trying to maintain your own group will give you nothing but headaches, you'll be doing all the work and getting little to no rewards. This is quite similar to the situation I'm in at 54. I joined a group that does a lot of stuff I wouldn't otherwise be interested in but yet after all the work I've put into getting up to speed with it I find I'm actually having fun which is enhanced considerably by the great response we get from crowds of sweet young things! The money is twice what any other group I've been in makes and we have a sound company on hire for every gig. In the long run this is also good for my retirement plans, I don't need to withdraw pocket money from the bank for my typical everyday spending which means I have more cash in the bank and more to sock away in my 401K. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ski219 Posted April 17, 2015 Author Members Share Posted April 17, 2015 Thanks guys. I played with the country band last night and have decided to join them. I still don't love a lot of the songs, but there are interesting guitar parts and I have a bit of a country rock style to my playing so it's not much of a stretch. They have good gigs and make OK $. Certainly more than I have been getting with my startup classic rock band and a lot less hassle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Goldtop5764 Posted April 26, 2015 Members Share Posted April 26, 2015 Dump the drama and go after the joy..... BTW ,, Good drummers are hard to find ... But examine the situation ,, is the bass player the one that brings the drama ? The Drummer ? If you are staying with the cover band then man up and be the leader , you will get the backing of the band that is tired of the drama and tell you to go for it ... otherwise , you are heading for a disaster if you dont head this off at the beginning ,,,, otherwise ,,, leave for the better option Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members elbowtx Posted April 27, 2015 Members Share Posted April 27, 2015 I go through this thought process on a regular basis. I was always "in the band" and decided to do my own thing and start my own project a few years ago. I thought it would be less stress and more satisfying, but instead I ended up doing everything and putting up with even more drama and taking on even more tasks and expense. I was not being a leader. I was trying to be the good guy all the time and it was killing me.. and the band. It's not for everyone. I'm not saying that was your case, but it was for mine. I did a reset about a year ago. I have my own band AND I LEAD it now. I am always open to suggestions for change or improvement, but I make the final decisions, good or bad, and I own the results. Things are much better for everyone now. I still play as a sub with other bands that give me a call to fill in here and there. I like to show up and play without stressing on all the details, but I know that's not what I want long-term, so when I get the occasional offer to join their projects as a full member, I politely say "no." Where would you be happier? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ski219 Posted April 28, 2015 Author Members Share Posted April 28, 2015 Update: So as I previously posted I did join the modern country band. We start practicing the week after next. They planned this move and have taken all of June off so my first gig with them will be in July. At the same time I have grown sick and tired of keeping the classic rock band going. We have a couple of gigs scheduled but not until August so plenty of time for them to replace me if they want to continue on. And, I decided to try to start a new project playing the kind of stuff I like to play: Dead, Clapton, The Band, Neville Bros. etc... I was in a band that played this kind of stuff for over 12 years before I quit due to career, marriage, kids, house and the general lack of time for a band that all that brought on We were actually pretty successful and gigged regularly for decent $. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Outkaster Posted April 28, 2015 Members Share Posted April 28, 2015 Let us know what happens later in the summer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members abzurd Posted April 29, 2015 Members Share Posted April 29, 2015 Update: So as I previously posted I did join the modern country band. We start practicing the week after next. They planned this move and have taken all of June off so my first gig with them will be in July. At the same time I have grown sick and tired of keeping the classic rock band going. We have a couple of gigs scheduled but not until August so plenty of time for them to replace me if they want to continue on. And, I decided to try to start a new project playing the kind of stuff I like to play: Dead, Clapton, The Band, Neville Bros. etc... I was in a band that played this kind of stuff for over 12 years before I quit due to career, marriage, kids, house and the general lack of time for a band that all that brought on We were actually pretty successful and gigged regularly for decent $. Maybe you've already done this, but I'd suggest you figure out whether you want to ultimately play out with your "new project" or if it's just for personal satisfaction. You can't serve two masters and it's not fair to hold the country band hostage based on when you're not playing with your "other band". That never works out long term and just causes animosity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ski219 Posted April 30, 2015 Author Members Share Posted April 30, 2015 Well the commitment I made to the country band is 2 gigs per month. I have told them I plan stick to that for a year and see how it feels then. THey say they are also OK with me being in 2 bands. My new project based on what I like to play will be more for personal satisfaction but may eventually eclipse the country thing and I would be fine with that. Should that happen I am fine with bowing out of the country thing. I have been in 2 bands before and you are right, conflicts happen and you have to choose one over the other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ski219 Posted June 16, 2015 Author Members Share Posted June 16, 2015 Update: When it rains it pours. So I am learning lots of new country songs. There are actually a lot of nice guitar parts so that keeps me interested and learning new riffs and phrasing is always a good thing. I am close to having 25 songs down and that is all we need for my first gig with them which is a 2 hour set at a town summer concert bandshell type gig. The pouring part is that my falling apart, drama filled rock band has suddenly started gelling and we now have 4 gigs on the books in July and August. So far nobody has tried to double book me but I know that can't/won't last. The Deadish band project has been relegated to an occasional jam type thing as I am so caught up in learning all these gosh darn new country songs. I haven't done a lot of gigging in the past couple of years and I miss it, but in the next few months I will be playing every weekend and I am sure that will get old after a while... I will enjoy the extra cash and free beer though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Vito Corleone Posted June 16, 2015 Members Share Posted June 16, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members StratGuy22 Posted June 16, 2015 Members Share Posted June 16, 2015 It all works out in the end. And if it doesnt, it's because it isn't the end yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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