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  • OK I'll post again.
    One time the group Sha Na Na was playing a two week stint at the venue I worked at. The monitor guy and the drummer had been harrassing each other all week long (in a friendly way). It was one of those prank for prank - Payback's a bitch things. There was a solo part of the show where most of the band left the stage for about 40 seconds. On the closing nite the drummer comes back on stage drenched from head to toe. The monitor guy had opened a sphigot and a garden hose on him full blast. By the end of the show he was mostly dried out (and with a greaser haircut his hair never changed a bit).

    Luckily he was such a cool guy (both the monitor guy and the drummer) that the only comment was..................Payback's a bitch...
    J.R. Previously jrble

    See my Dog Of The Hair studio at: http://www.dogoth.com/studio/

    Quote from someone: Flat response? Get out the jack and change the tire.
    If you think "power is knowledge", you have it backwards.

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    • OK, I told this one over on OJ but I see it's on my list here. Without further ado, here is:

      The Chick Pulling the Train Backstage at GS

      One time I found myself working a really large show at a skating rink in Brenham, TX. The headliner was a famous country artist you'd all know, but it's best I don't use his name as really he had nothing to do with what happened that night.

      This handsome entertainer is a magnet to the ladies. Most of them are content with just screaming during certain quiet parts of his songs, or holding their boots up to be autographed. Then, I guess, they go home to their husbands and the husbands wonder what's gotten into their wives.

      But of course some less stable women are attracted also, from time to time. This was one of those times.

      So I'm back at the FOH pre show making sure all the routing is working as I want it to. There will be opener, then the main guy. The huge skating rink has two stages so we've got two snakes and things are a little more complex than usual.

      I'm deep in thought and it takes me a moment to notice that a stunning young woman with a big bag is trying to get my attention. I'm on an elevated platform, so the first thing I notice is her considerable cleavage. Instinctively I glance sideways at my brother-in-law, who is assisting me tonight. I'd be a terrible poker player, I have so many tells.

      But of course the young lady is not there to meet me. She wants to meet the famous singer guy. She tells me that she feels a "connection" to him and that if only she could talk to him, she's sure he'd feel that way also. She realizes he's a busy guy, so she's put her thoughts together in the form of letters - HUNDREDS of letters.

      She strongly hints that she will be VERY grateful to me if I can help her with this.

      I told her I only knew G in that I was working for him, but that I was pretty sure he wasn't going to read a bunch of love letters in a bag. She reiterated what her gratitude might be, making it even plainer than before.

      Now, me being freshly married and at the gig with my brother-in-law, I didn't do what I ordinarily would have (probably not what you're thinking). And my brother-in-law couldn't tackle the job if he wanted to with me there either, so we kinda canceled each other out.

      All I could think of was to scrape her off my shoe onto one of the single guys in the opening band, a nice guy I knew. So I told her "I think Ronnie Joe plays golf with G, you might try him, he's somewhere backstage in the dressing room area." And I gave her a laminate to get her through - though probably she could have just talked her way backstage, she was very young and cute.

      Anyway, that was the last I knew about it for a while because I was working. After the opener finished their set, some of those guys and their entourage were milling around the sound board talking and I heard them discussing the chick with the letters. I asked one of the guitar players to tell me what happened.

      He said that he didn't know how it got started, but that he found a line of guys waiting to get in the backstage bathroom and he asked what was up (thinking someone was hogging the bathroom). The guys in line told him some crazy chick was in there pulling a train.

      I asked Rob (the guitar player), "What?!! Did you f**k her?" He said, "F**k no! I just waited my turn in line and when I saw her on the floor all gross I just said, 'You're disgusting!' and spat on her!"



      I found this conversation quite alarming, and as it was between sets I immediately went backstage to see if she was OK (though really, how could she be?) I couldn't find her so I asked a few guys and everyone knew who I was talking about. They all seemed a little embarrassed too.

      Finally someone said, "She's out back sitting on an AC compressor, her boyfriend is with her, he's going ballistic and she's all freaked out and crying."

      I went outside and the situation was exactly as described. I hung out at my truck pretending to look through some cables for a few minutes, just in case he was going to start hitting her. After I had heard some of the conversation enough to judge that it wasn't going to turn violent, I figured it was none of my business and I went back to work the show.

      I often wonder what happened to that girl. Even more often, I wonder how someone can lose their mind over a celebrity.

      Terry D.
      Telling Stories releases 2nd CD, see our WEBSITE! Please check out my GROUPIE STORY and Tales from the Road.

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      • OK I'll post again.
        One time the group Sha Na Na was playing a two week stint at the venue I worked at. The monitor guy and the drummer had been harrassing each other all week long (in a friendly way). It was one of those prank for prank - Payback's a bitch things. There was a solo part of the show where most of the band left the stage for about 40 seconds. On the closing nite the drummer comes back on stage drenched from head to toe. The monitor guy had opened a sphigot and a garden hose on him full blast. By the end of the show he was mostly dried out (and with a greaser haircut his hair never changed a bit).

        Luckily he was such a cool guy (both the monitor guy and the drummer) that the only comment was..................Payback's a bitch...



        Ahhh, payback!

        My monitor guy (sort of) and the lead singer for an international touring act (name not disclosed) who was finishing up the last night of a 10 or so week tour, got into it on stage in the second half of the show. Turns out the tour manager was throwing a "nerf" type ball at the lead singer while standing behind the monitor console, and the singer had turned it into a big game by throwing it back to my guy. Turns out the tour manager had more than nerf balls, he had small stuffed animals, dolls, and it did pretty much disrupt the show but by then it had turned into kind of a fiesta type atmsophere. It was all in good fun, and the audience got into it also, as he threw stuff into the audience, and they threw it back etc.

        Well, the other part of the story is that this was a performing arts organizatiion that put this event on, we had been their sound contractor for almost 20 years by this time, and the average age of the audience was about 60. There were some students in the audience too, as it was a university organization. Anyway, the university promotor (older guy) came back stage as the show was getting ready to end and just ripped my guy a new one for "trashing" his show. Now my monitor guy's a pretty straight shooter, he's also a lawyer and does this for fun now (and some pretty good money too as we were the experienced company in town) and he's concerned as to how to respond since he had nothing to do (for the most part, though he wasn't "entirely" innocent) and the tour manager see's this coming down and was a good sport in that he immediately defused the sitiuation, along with the lead singer, and they dragged both my monitor guy AND the promoter on stage and then he thanked the promoter for providing all the toys and starting the big fun. Of course, now the promoter is back pedaling and doesn't know how to respond on stage in front of 1500 people, and then he thanks my monitor guy for being such a good sport and a good monitor engineer and it was a perfect end to a North American tour.

        The best part about this is that the band helped us load out then took us out to a really nice dinner and drinks before they prepared to leave for home (West Africa IIRC). The promoter did appologize and it turns out that this was just another first for the organization, the blue hairs can let their hair down if given a chance.
        -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
        Former product development engineer: Genz Benz, a KMC Music/FMIC/JAM Industries Company, continuing factory level product support and service for Genz Benz

        Currently product development engineer: Mesa Boogie

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        • We had an outdoor event last weekend so set up our usual outdoor rig, with subs, tops, and micing everything on stage. Running the I-pod through the system sounded great before the show, and people were digging the first few songs. But then people started coming up and saying our speakers were making noises (the dreaded fart noises). But we kept on going as the set was almost done, planning to spend the break figuring out the problem. Turned on the I-pod and everything sounded great. Then the drummer goes "hey, the snare mic's been sitting on the drum head the whole set!" Dohhh.
          Proud new owner of a circa '73-'75 SVT
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          • ...For my own knowledge, do you really get speakers that light up from the inside like that to indicate clipping?

            -Nigel


            It's not uncommon for speaker manufacturers to use bulbs in place of slo-blow fuses. If you can see inside the speaker when it's running your view is of the bulb lighting up. It ain't supposed to smoke, though.
            That's my opinion and it oughta be yours. - Makk Trukk, WSIX, Nashville, Tn.

            If I experience any more personal, emotional or spiritual growth I'm gonna puke. - DJP, 10/05

            Yeah, exactly! There's some things that maybe you DON'T want to fix at the source!! - Ken/Eleven Shadows on the Castrati, 3/06


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            • Man, it's going to take me months to read through this thread...

              I've got a few stories, first one that comes to mind is playing in a Christian rock band in the late 80's.

              We have of course decided we're the next Styper of the decade and everything is taken about as serious as possible. We've been practicing and playing small gigs here and there for months and then we get a call that someone wants us to play at the crystal cathedral. We're stoked and have about 6 weeks to get things tightened up so we're "worthy". Problem is we've got this Samoan guitar player that's about as lazy as you can find. (not saying Samoans are lazy) He's late to practice if he even bothers to show up. Finally two weeks before the gig we find a replacement guitar player but there's one problem. This new guy can't sing worth crap so the rest of us come up with this genius idea.

              The guitar player is put "on probation" show up for every practice on time and you're still in the band, but to punish you for the crap, you can't play the next two gigs, only sing backup, but off-stage where nobody can see you.

              Now we get to the gig only to find out it's not quite what we think, we're playing in the GYM at the crystal cathedral while the youth group eats dinner...... Anyway we set up full stage and sound. We had built our own stacks of dual 15's for subs and 15-12-horn combo on top on either side of the stage. We get ready to warm up and play, but there's only one problem. There's no "off-stage" for the guitar player to sing at. Solution? Picture this in your mind.

              Six foot four, two hundred ninety pound Samoan dude trying to stand up behind one of the main speaker stacks and hide so nobody can see him. So many people we pointing at him that eventually in a deep voice he says "pay no mind to the man behind the speakers" which of course causes all of use and the crowd to lose it. Needless to say that was the last time we "punished" anyone. At the end though the lead singer ended up ticked because most of the crowd thought he was lip syncing and the guitar player was really singing the lead lines.

              -mike
              Current "Stuff"
              Keyboards:
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              Modules: Roland JV-880 Alesis S4 Roland Sound Canvas Korg 05R/W
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              • I have to ask

                "He said that he didn't know how it got started, but that he found a line of guys waiting to get in the backstage bathroom and he asked what was up (thinking someone was hogging the bathroom). The guys in line told him some crazy chick was in there pulling a train. "


                Pulling a train ?
                Yamaha RM1x, Yamaha AN1x, Zoom RFX1000, Xenyx 1202, Akai MPD24, Reaper, Reason ? no discernable talent.

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                • My Brother,

                  Gang Bang!

                  For some of us who grew up during the late 60's and early 70's, when a chick allowed a group of guys to "have their way with her", she was "pulling a train"!
                  Summit111
                  "King Pa-Ka-Yea' Band"
                  "Old School Rock & Roll"

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                  • Damn, wish I was a famous Country singer............no I don't even I couldn't stoop that low for free sex
                    Yamaha RM1x, Yamaha AN1x, Zoom RFX1000, Xenyx 1202, Akai MPD24, Reaper, Reason ? no discernable talent.

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                    • Speaking of country singers, there seems to be a resurgence of country turned gospel acts floating around the central Texas area as of late. I've been gone from the forums for a while...slaving 15 hours a day for a master's degree tends to take the fun out of everything, but about 3 months ago, I ran a show as a favor for my wife's old church out in a desolate little town called Rosebud. Mr. Knobs would probably know where this little hole in the wall is. Unfortunately, my father-in-law is also the pastor at this little church. Against all my warnings, they decided the best thing to do for the youth in the county was to host a 'mini Christian Woodstock' in the middle of a cow pasture. After having to bum 2 generators off of my dad and supervising the building of a decent sized stage 5 feet off the ground, I was prepared to run this 6 hour fiasco for 5 bands. One of the bands that came hired a lead singer who was a reformed ex bar hopping country singer that I unfortunately had numerous run-ins with. After seeing the light, this guy now had a need to spread the gospel to as many needy women as possible. Needless to say, I knew this whole event was going to go downhill pretty quick with this guy a part of it. The first three bands did pretty good (or as best could be done for groups of 17 year olds playing their favorite Switchfoot songs), but when the 'gospel singer's' group came up, I could pretty much tell things were about to fall apart. Visibly inebriated, he took the stage and sang some standard gospel songs, slurring the lyrics as best he could. The one that took the house down was medley of "I'll Fly Away" going into a very disjunct version of Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire", and then into an obscure Pat Green song called "John Wayne and Jesus". While the kids in the audience loved it, the singer apparently was eying some under aged girl in the front of the crowd and felt the best way to end the set was to pull a Garth Brooks and take his acoustic guitar and smash it into a set of my JBL 2x15s! This didn't shock me as much as him then losing his balance, grabbing onto one of the speakers and then falling off the stage with the speaker. Through all of this, the band stayed together and never missed a beat, amidst wide eyes and laughter from the audience. By this point, I was seeing red and damn near about to kill the entire system and tell everyone to leave. Hobbling around the side of the stage in embarrassment, the singer went to his truck and opened a can of beer, cussing profusely in front of my father-in-law about how cheap the pay was for gospel music and the absolute waste of talent he spent only to be embarrassed because I was jealous and rigged the speaker to 'push him when he got near it'. Miraculously, the singer ended up with a fractured ankle and my speakers only ended up with a 4" crack to the casing. Needless to say, the singer's moved back to country music after a buddy of mine told him that the majority of the girls at these events were jail bait.
                      Current Rig:
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                      • Ok,here's mine,I was playing a festival show and it was sunny as all getout.As we were setting up,rain came out of nowhere! $$$ of equipment was gonna be soaked!A tarp was thrown over everything and the wind was whipping!Suddenly the rain cleared and we resumed.Later I strapped on my Tokai V and we went into "Crazy on you" by Heart.I went to sing my backup part and BOOM!the mike explodes and i'm thrown backwards and my Tokai V gets a huge chip in the side!I got real mad and grabbed my spare guitar,A 1990 Yamaha RGX 112 only to find it out of tune!Not one of my better gigs.
                        -Will

                        Guitars: Suhr Modern, Tom Anderson Drop Top T, Heritage Custom Shop H535 Classic, MANN Les Paul Special (MIJ lawsuit) Ibanez RG7620, Martin 0015M
                        Amplification: Bogner Ecstasy 101B/Mesa Boogie Rectifier 2x12 (V30s) Hughes and Kettner TubeMeister 18 combo

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                        • One just came to mind.

                          Back in the day I used to play occasionaly (weekend warrior stuff) at being a drummer. I used to play with this bass player/singer who had the most horrendous tone (we used to call it the farting bass). The guy had a single 18" cabinet with a reducer ring and a 15" driver (nowhere near enough air dampening for this driver). On top of this he would turn the bass to 10 and the treble to 0 on his amp. He was also proud that he had gotten 13 years of use out of his current strings.

                          Now to set things straight. This guy was an excelent singer/frontman and in the context of what we were playing (mostly old motown as a trio) his bass was sort of a FAT percussion instrument (kind of like an augmented bass drum). You couldn't really distinguish any exact notes (it was more like lumpy mud) but that was ok because it made for a really FAT (did I say fat before) foundation for our trio. We all sang well (great harmony) and in the end everyone danced their butts off. But I'll never forget the farting bass.
                          J.R. Previously jrble

                          See my Dog Of The Hair studio at: http://www.dogoth.com/studio/

                          Quote from someone: Flat response? Get out the jack and change the tire.
                          If you think "power is knowledge", you have it backwards.

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                          • Today, a (pro) throw-together band is playing a large festival I am doing and the bandleader places set lists for the guys, but it's all songs they haven't played together or in some cases didn't even know. He did it just to see the expressions on their faces... nobody wanted to admit they didn't know what was going on and the band leader milked it for what it was worth. Nicely played joke, I'm sure the rest of the band will eventually get even.
                            -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
                            Former product development engineer: Genz Benz, a KMC Music/FMIC/JAM Industries Company, continuing factory level product support and service for Genz Benz

                            Currently product development engineer: Mesa Boogie

                            Comment


                            • Today, a (pro) throw-together band is playing a large festival I am doing and the bandleader places set lists for the guys, but it's all songs they haven't played together or in some cases didn't even know. He did it just to see the expressions on their faces... nobody wanted to admit they didn't know what was going on and the band leader milked it for what it was worth. Nicely played joke, I'm sure the rest of the band will eventually get even.


                              That is mean ... I was just thinking that i hadn't seen this thread on the front page for awhile and it was getting to be time to get it back.

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                              • Ok, absolutely bonehead idiot story for you.

                                Doing recording (which I haven't done often) of the band. 16 channel digital recorder with 8 ins (balanced TRS jacks).

                                Because I don't have enough cannon to trs jack cables I'm doing a workaround with a sub mix of drums + 2 guitars on aux's through a mixer for four of the channels. All my cables into the recorder are the same having gotten them made at the same time with the same ends.

                                Started testing out the drum sound, kick and snare are fine, toms and overheads through the sub mix sound really distant and hollow. Spend a good half an hour on it adjusting mics, adjusting eq's and panicing trying to get something approaching not awful.

                                Get the guitars to check their levels, sub mix levels are through the roof from the drums - I've mixed up the inputs for half an hour, the tom and overhead mics were confusted with the mics on two guitar amps 5 meters away. Quick swap around of channels and a rough recording of one song and we were good to go.

                                After that everything went smoothly and we recorded something like 15 tracks in 3 hours (except for minor overdubs on backing vocals).

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