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Have you ever experienced stage fright?


Dendy Jarrett

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I used to get stage fright. Not horrible, just nerves. I'm not really sure what made it go away, but I think it was a combination of factors:

 

  • I realized not everyone was going to like my performances, so that took the pressure off of trying to please everyone.
  • I started making eye contact with individuals. It's easier to play for one person than a crowd.
  • Before the gig, I always made sure I had backup - strings if a string broke, extra cables, etc. It gave a feeling of confidence that removed a potentially negative "what if" from the equation.

 

I think stage fright relates directly to confidence. But that doesn't mean you have to think you're great when you take the stage. Instead, it's about adopting Andy Warhol's favorite phrase - "So what?"

 

So what if they don't like me? So what if a string breaks? So what if I muff a chord? In the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter. So there's no reason to get nervous about it.

 

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I never had stage fright. Perhaps because I started early, perhaps because I'm too stupid, but definitely not because I was confident back then (I am now, but I've been doing it a long, long time).

 

I started playing sax in the school band when I was in the 7th grade.

 

About a year later I got in a rock and roll band. We were terrible, but we didn't know that. Every band comprised of people our age was terrible back then.

 

So we practiced and practiced and eventually got a lot of songs together. The Jr. High School hired us for a sock hop. So there I was on the stage, with my very best friends, having the time of my life playing those pop songs we loved and joyously worked so hard to put together. People were dancing and to my surprise and delight, I noticed that cute girl who didn't even acknowledge my existence in English class "making eyes" at me. And at the end of the night they actually paid me $10 (which was big money back then). Hell, I would have paid them $10 for that experience!!!

 

That is when I knew that this is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

 

In the passing decades, I've had a few, very few. bad gigs. Always because we were mis-booked. But I've played just about every venue a musician can play, from seedy dives to concert stages as the warm up band for the headliner to cruise ships to 5 star hotels to Elk's lodges to show clubs to whatever, and never-ever had stage fright. I'm very comfortable on stage with an instrument in my hands and a mic in my face.

 

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Ironically, In drum corps we performed in front of 180K people in one night. With another artist, at an outdoor country music festival out west, we performed in front of over 200K people. However, those don't bother me. It's playing in front of one person or a small group. Outside of not being able to complete "jury" in college because I had the shakes so bad I couldn't play scales on a xylophone, the worst gig was playing the Bluebird Cafe in Nashville. You are literally on top of people's tables and they are "in your face". It was probably 50 people in the crowd. Once I got started, it went well and the jitters subsided, but before we started, I was a basket case.

 

D

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I never had stage fright. Perhaps because I started early, perhaps because I'm too stupid, but definitely not because I was confident back then (I am now, but I've been doing it a long, long time).

 

I started playing sax in the school band when I was in the 7th grade.

 

About a year later I got in a rock and roll band. We were terrible, but we didn't know that. Every band comprised of people our age was terrible back then.

 

So we practiced and practiced and eventually got a lot of songs together. The Jr. High School hired us for a sock hop. So there I was on the stage, with my very best friends, having the time of my life playing those pop songs we loved and joyously worked so hard to put together. People were dancing and to my surprise and delight, I noticed that cute girl who didn't even acknowledge my existence in English class "making eyes" at me. And at the end of the night they actually paid me $10 (which was big money back then). Hell, I would have paid them $10 for that experience!!!

 

That is when I knew that this is what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

 

In the passing decades, I've had a few, very few. bad gigs. Always because we were mis-booked. But I've played just about every venue a musician can play, from seedy dives to concert stages as the warm up band for the headliner to cruise ships to 5 star hotels to Elk's lodges to show clubs to whatever, and never-ever had stage fright. I'm very comfortable on stage with an instrument in my hands and a mic in my face.

 

Love - love- love that story Notes! "Hell, I would have paid them $10 for that experience!" Priceless!

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When the curtain opened the first time I went onstage with a band, I looked out at the audience and it seemed like there were so many people in the auditorium they were dripping from the balcony as if in a Dali painting.

 

I was playing piano and the first song was in D flat. I was so nervous that my sweating hands kept slipping off the black keys down on to the white keys so everything I played sounded out of tune with the rest of the band.

 

Normally, when I feel that uncomfortable in a situation I don't go back to the situation. I usually write it off as not being right for me but, for some reason, it is different when it comes to performing music.

 

Forty some tears later I still get nervous just before a show but now I channel it into excitement rather than allowing it to debilitate me.

 

Early on I had some difficulties with guitar cables and not having enough spare strings so I vowed that would never happen again. As Craig suggested in post #2, being prepared for the inevitable string break or occasional equipment failure goes a long way to reducing the stress associated with stage fright.

 

 

 

 

 

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We were discussing this over in Solos and Duos a while back.

I personally have never experienced that crippling, nausea inducing sense of dread that folks call 'stage fright'. I think it may be akin to an actual phobia for some people; and this goes way beyond performance anxiety. I have been 'nervous' before shows, but I chalk that up to anticipation and adrenaline, not fear.

I started at an early age, church choir, school plays, NYC All-City Chorus [the year my voice changed, I went from tenor to baritone], theater/bands in high school, a duo my freshman year in college, touring with a national act at 19, festival gigs...but I understand it happens and for some people it is insurmountable.

Preparation is certainly a good piece of avoiding nervousness, but some people really do it to themselves with the 'what-ifs', and that is self-defeating, because you can only plan for the logical eventualities; but I have seen people worry themselves sick that they might make a mistake on stage...heck, I probably make several per set...the secret? Ignore it all. Go do what you came to do.

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If you get a chance, do read the review I did on this book. It's a great book.

 

When I was at the University of S.C., I had crippling stage fright. Especially when it came to playing for my professors and even more, in test Jury's in school. I couldn't play the marimba once - not even scales, because my mallets were shaking so uncontrollably. It was a horrible experience.

 

As I've aged and play more and more, it has become something I've learned to harness.

 

D

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Probably from some very uncomfortable public speaking I had to do in the past. I've heard that some people would rather die than speak/perform/act in front of an audience. I'm one of those people.

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I started playing when I was 5. Much to my surprise and dismay trouble began when I was about 13. I had some really bad experiences. Looking back, I think all the sugar I was putting down contributed. But it's more complex than that. Anyway, as many know, once you've had the bad time, it rattles around in you for ages until you've put in some very hard work and no small amount of courage that hopefully puts some good experiences on top. I never found anything that anyone said to try and help to be much help at all I'm afraid.

 

​By the time I was 18 I had it ground down and was in good form for most of my 20's. Not that I could ever really forget. But somewhere between being prepared and over prepared I kept the wolf at bay. Regaining one's confidence is a beautiful thing.

 

​And then one night on the stage of the Koger Center it happened. Like I was 13 again. Basically just froze. In a violin section of all places. I was sitting "outside", on the edge of the stage. I was burned out from cramming for tests and gigging too much, and my then wife and I had friends who liked to party far too hard. All my hard work came undone and I had to rebuild my stage legs all over again.

 

​Ultimately, it boiled down to being extremely well prepared, and a mindset that I will not wait in fear, or be prey to it. I learned to treat my body like an athlete whose every game could be the biggest game of his life. No more burning the candle at both ends. The price was way too high.

 

Walking out and looking at the audience and smiling at them, the simplest thing, can make a big difference. It did for me. It meant I was in with both feet, and would not be afraid. And facing any qualms that would come as I played, ( before they take hold and become monsters ) with a loud internal NO, followed by whatever I could do to be assertive physically/mentally with the music at hand worked too. I did regain my confidence again.

 

You can never forget though, if it has happened to you. You can only be brave enough to keep going, and stay in the fight if it's important to you.

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My worst bout of stage fright was in the Band Hall at University of S.C. during Jury. - Awful. However, some of my best memories were hanging out in the Band Hall, and walking up for an open face roast beef at "The Bird" (no longer there) :(

 

 

ps: Go Gamecocks!

D

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Never had stage fright, just excitement and butterflies... came to cherish that "pregnant moment": plugging in pedals, audience chattering, in between music playing, other bandmate's various focused energies, snatches of music from amps, in between music turned down, announcer introducing us, 5,4,3,2..1, GO!

 

One of those externally asserted be-here-now moments that are so rare. Loved it!

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I had a wee bit of it early on - at 13 in a battle of the bands thing. After that I was playing so much it just seemed like another day.

But 20 years later, after raising kids & all, returning to the stage, I had a bit of a struggle with myself about it. The cure involved playing a lot, and playing out a lot, and meditative techniques. Being in the right frame of mind before you go up makes all the difference.

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I had a wee bit of it early on - at 13 in a battle of the bands thing. After that I was playing so much it just seemed like another day.

But 20 years later, after raising kids & all, returning to the stage, I had a bit of a struggle with myself about it. The cure involved playing a lot, and playing out a lot, and meditative techniques. Being in the right frame of mind before you go up makes all the difference.

 

I very much agree. 2 points I meant to get to.

 

It helped a lot though it was rough going at times to be in a situation where I was regularly thrown back into the fire.

 

If a person only plays a few times a year, it's harder to rebound I think. Gotta get back on that horse, soon and often.

 

And I had more than a bit of help from meditation/biofeedback techniques. When you can bring yourself down to 2 - 3 breaths per minute you've found a new level of control.

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Never had stage fright, just excitement and butterflies... came to cherish that "pregnant moment": plugging in pedals, audience chattering, in between music playing, other bandmate's various focused energies, snatches of music from amps, in between music turned down, announcer introducing us, 5,4,3,2..1, GO!

 

One of those externally asserted be-here-now moments that are so rare. Loved it!

 

​It's a cool thing when you can be excited in a positive way, far more eager to show than concerned about showing.

 

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