Jump to content

Uber-people


Hard Truth

Recommended Posts

  • Members

They're tall, thin, athletic, good-looking, personable and smart. Everything seems to be easy for them, but they know how to focus and work hard. Most of them come from prosperous families, but some are self-made.

 

A typical statement from one of them "I just came back from helping Doctors without Borders do reconstructive surgery on injured Rwandan war babies, I'm going to spend the week preparing to do the triathalon coming up this weekend and helping my oldest kid fill out his application for Harvard before I go back to working at my law firm. Oh, and on Thursday night I'm going to be a runway model for the charity fashion show."

 

They would be easy to hate if they weren't such good conversationalists and so damn nice and polite.

 

Do you know any? Are you one of them?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Meh. People are people. If they spent a little more time figuring out how to improve themselves and less on what they see in others, they'd probably all be better off. I've said before and I'll say again, I'd be accused of speciesism if I wasn't human myself. We're largish naked apes. I don't know why we should feel like we're so special.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

They're tall, thin, athletic, good-looking, personable and smart.

 

Well, I don't really consider myself uber, but thanks for the compliment. :lol:

 

Everything seems to be easy for them, but they know how to focus and work hard. Most of them come from prosperous families, but some are self-made.


A typical statement from one of them "I just came back from helping Doctors without Borders do reconstructive surgery on Rwanda war babies, I'm going to spend the week preparing to do the triathalon coming up this weekend and. . .

 

It's really interesting that you should mention this. I was just reading a 'get to know me' section in the paper about a local dentist. Good looking guy. Probably no more than 5 years older than me. Obviously professionally and financially secure. Comes from a good family...Dad was a veterinarian and allowed his son to help him during surgeries from which I gather he learned a lot. This guy competes in Ironman triathlons. I mean, he's seemingly perfect. The word "can't" isn't in his dictionary.

 

I find people like this fascinating and somewhat perplexing because it's very hard for me to relate. I've always struggled. My Dad was somewhat of a pioneering systems analyst (before anyone knew what a systems analyst was), whom I could have learned a lot from, but he was also an alcoholic/workaholic who almost never felt I was worth spending any time with. My Mom was an anxiety ridden co-dependent who saw it necessary to protect her son from anything that would cause him to struggle and grow....Think the song 'Mother' from Pink Floyd and you'll get an idea. Neither of my parents could agree on how best to raise their son so they really did very little. I was never disciplined or pushed to accomplish anything. I was a depressed only child who felt loved but also felt like a disappointment to my parents, so probably not worthy of love. I floundered during my teens, hated school, not sure what I should do or if I should do anything. I started to pick up some slack during my twenties but then was hit with major depression which took me about 7 years to finally get under control, during which I was able to accomplish very little.

 

It has not been easy, and there are many times I wonder how much I could have been had I had a functioning family unit to grow in. I am however often amazed that I'm not sitting in a {censored}hole somewhere dying from a drug problem. As it turned out, I'm doing pretty well.

 

I don't believe in "uber-people". I believe that your attitude determines your reality. However, while I do not believe that we are limited by our upbringing, I do believe that our upbringing sets the stage for who we are likely to become. We have it within our power to become who we want, but course corrections are harder to make than simply flying the flightplan you were given. And major course corrections are really hard to make.

 

When I think of the dentist I mentioned earlier, I imagine a person who's life has not been without hardships, but who was given the direction, the support, and the tools necessary for him to become who he is by a family that cared enough to invest their time and energy into raising him rather than just doing damage control. For that, I envy him.

 

My chance to redeem myself comes in the form of my two kids. If I can raise them into healthy, happy, productive individuals my life will not have been wasted.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

They're tall, thin, athletic, good-looking, personable and smart. Everything seems to be easy for them, but they know how to focus and work hard. Most of them come from prosperous families, but some are self-made.


A typical statement from one of them "I just came back from helping Doctors without Borders do reconstructive surgery on injured Rwandan war babies, I'm going to spend the week preparing to do the triathalon coming up this weekend and helping my oldest kid fill out his application for Harvard before I go back to working at my law firm. Oh, and on Thursday night I'm going to be a runway model for the charity fashion show."


They would be easy to hate if they weren't such good conversationalists and so damn nice and polite.


Do you know any? Are you one of them?

 

:D

 

 

 

 

 

Richard Cory

 

by Edwin Arlington Robinson, 1869-1935

 

Whenever Richard Cory went down town,

We people on the pavement looked at him;

He was a gentleman from sole to crown,

Clean favored, and imperially slim.

 

And he was always quietly arrayed,

And he was always human when he talked;

But still he fluttered pulses when he said,

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Probably if you look behind the curtain you may often find that it's not all good, but then again perhaps that's just sour grapes on my part. Can't is probably in my dicationary but I can't spell it, so I can't know for sure.

 

I'm somewhat of a student of the history science and physics, so I read a lot about the history of physics and the important folks along that road. I always find it interesting how so many of these great physicists, say back in the late 1800s and early 1900s when physics was exploding, would always take regular vacations, at a time when taking a vaction wasn't a couple hours flight. They spent a lot of time socializing, many times more than I do, but still managed to do so much in terms of their professional lives. They'd go off sailing and biking and hiking and visting all the time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I'll meet your Richard Cory with some Kinks, Ray Davies seemed a bit obseessed by uber-people.

 

Well Respected Man

cause he gets up in the morning,

And he goes to work at nine,

And he comes back home at five-thirty,

Gets the same train every time.

cause his world is built round punctuality,

It never fails.

 

And hes oh, so good,

And hes oh, so fine,

And hes oh, so healthy,

In his body and his mind.

Hes a well respected man about town,

Doing the best things so conservatively.

 

And his mother goes to meetings,

While his father pulls the maid,

And she stirs the tea with councilors,

While discussing foreign trade,

And she passes looks, as well as bills

At every suave young man

 

cause hes oh, so good,

And hes oh, so fine,

And hes oh, so healthy,

In his body and his mind.

Hes a well respected man about town,

Doing the best things so conservatively.

 

And he likes his own backyard,

And he likes his fags the best,

cause hes better than the rest,

And his own sweat smells the best,

And he hopes to grab his fathers loot,

When pater passes on.

 

cause hes oh, so good,

And hes oh, so fine,

And hes oh, so healthy,

In his body and his mind.

Hes a well respected man about town,

Doing the best things so conservatively.

 

And he plays at stocks and shares,

And he goes to the regatta,

And he adores the girl next door,

cause hes dying to get at her,

But his mother knows the best about

The matrimonial stakes.

 

cause hes oh, so good,

And hes oh, so fine,

And hes oh, so healthy,

In his body and his mind.

Hes a well respected man about town,

Doing the best things so conservatively.

 

David Watts

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

 

I am a dull and simple lad

Can not tell water from champagne

And I have never met the queen

And I wish I could have all that he has got

I wish I could be like david watts

 

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

 

And when I lie on my pillow at night

I dream I could fight like david watts

Lead the school team to victory

And take my exams and pass the lot

 

(wish I could be)

Wish I could be like david watts

(wish I could be)

Wish I could be like david watts

(wish I could be)

Conduct my life like david watts

(wish I could be)

I wish I could be like david watts

 

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

 

He is the head boy at the school

He is the captain of the team

He is so gay and fancy free

And I wish all his money belonged to me

I wish I could be like david watts

 

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

 

And all the girls in the neighborhood

Try to go out with david watts

They try their best but cant succeed

For he is of pure and noble breed

 

Wish I could be like

Wish I could be like

Wish I could be like

 

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

Fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa-fa

 

and for fun Simon & Grafunkel's rewrite of Richard Cory:

 

They say that Richard Cory owns one half of this whole town,

With political connections to spread his wealth around.

Born into society, a banker's only child,

He had everything a man could want: power, grace, and style.

 

But I work in his factory

And I curse the life I'm living

And I curse my poverty

And I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

 

The papers print his picture almost everywhere he goes:

Richard Cory at the opera, Richard Cory at a show.

And the rumor of his parties and the orgies on his yacht!

Oh, he surely must be happy with everything he's got.

 

But I work in his factory

And I curse the life I'm living

And I curse my poverty

And I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

 

He freely gave to charity, he had the common touch,

And they were grateful for his patronage and thanked him very much,

So my mind was filled with wonder when the evening headlines read:

"Richard Cory went home last night and put a bullet through his head."

 

But I work in his factory

And I curse the life I'm living

And I curse my poverty

And I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be,

Oh, I wish that I could be

Richard Cory.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'd love to leave my opinion on the subject but I'm in a rush, heading to play in a concert in benefit of the people affected on the floods in Tabasco, Mexico.

 

After that, I'm on a "slave auction" in benefit of the same people.

 

.. does that make me "uber people"? At least that does NOT make me thin and tall :cry:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

 

Just remember we're really just one being playing all the different roles of different people to keep from being bored. Being aware of this is far more important than merely overachieving. Look under the surface.


Steve

 

 

As much as many is one, one is still many. We are one, and we are many. The surface is a mirror.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I know quite a handful of "achievement people" at various stages of life--one whole family of them into which I married, many of whom have a rather mechanistic view of growth and achievement and righteous opinion and action, and I'm telling you, they're not without depth and their not without heart and they're not incapable of humility, but their approach to achievement, skill acquisition, and empathy will never NEVER get them very far on the saxophone.

 

No further than a decent marching band, for sure.

 

So if you want be successful and, more, efficacious, cultivate certain habits of mind and will like theirs--doggedly linear and disciplined, goal-defining and goal oriented; but if you want to play the saxophone and mean it, I truly believe it is a different path.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators

I know quite a handful of "achievement people" at various stages of life--one whole family of them into which I married, many of whom have a rather mechanistic view of growth and achievement and righteous opinion and action, and I'm telling you, they're not without depth and their not without heart and they're not incapable of humility, but their approach to achievement, skill acquisition, and empathy will never NEVER get them very far on the saxophone.


No further than a decent marching band, for sure.


 

I loved that. Thank you. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

 

So if you want be successful and, more, efficacious, cultivate certain habits of mind and will like theirs--doggedly linear and disciplined, goal-defining and goal oriented; but if you want to play the saxophone and mean it, I truly believe it is a different path.

 

 

Yeah, but what about Bill Clinton?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I know quite a handful of "achievement people" at various stages of life--one whole family of them into which I married, many of whom have a rather mechanistic view of growth and achievement and righteous opinion and action, and I'm telling you, they're not without depth and their not without heart and they're not incapable of humility, but their approach to achievement, skill acquisition, and empathy will never NEVER get them very far on the saxophone.


No further than a decent marching band, for sure.


So if you want be successful and, more, efficacious, cultivate certain habits of mind and will like theirs--doggedly linear and disciplined, goal-defining and goal oriented; but if you want to play the saxophone and mean it, I truly believe it is a different path.

 

Wow... I don't think you could have stated this more perfectly and you've also just described my own internal process. To put it bluntly, I'm somewhat capable of being an "uber person" in that I'm quite well rounded and competent in a lot of areas. But I never will be that type of person because I'm an artist first. I don't mean so much my work, but my temperament. Anytime I do something that seems too disciplined and linear and goal oriented, I find a way to screw it up. :lol: And it's not "self sabotage" although it would seem that way to an uber person - it's actually protecting myself because I am just miserable in those situations. I crave my reflection time - I just break down if I have a packed calendar for months on end. And I crave the mental space to be spontaneous - if everything I do is part of some goal or expectation placed on me, I cease being productive at all. I can be and often am really driven, but the drive originates in a place I can't necessarily control.

 

For the most part I've managed to structure my life so that it caters to my temperament - I can usually pick and choose when I work and what I do at any given time. And I could go a lot "farther" with everything I do, if I were more goal oriented. But I'm not. I didn't go into business for myself to make lots of money - I did it so I would have the time and flexibility I crave. I've got work out the wazoo and most people would think I'm nuts not to do it, but I often put it off, or turn it down. It doesn't make for great financial stability, but I manage. I don't really have a lot of choice, cuz I've tried and it always leads to disaster - if I had to behave like a type A person to survive, I'd shoot myself. Seriously, I can't imagine it.

 

There are a lot of uber people that I admire. Some of them seem unhappy and trying too hard to overcompensate for a basic self esteem problem, but some seem quite genuinely well adjusted too. I admire many of them and their contributions to society, but I don't envy them. I know I ain't like them and wasn't meant to be. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

There was this guy, he used to be an undertaker before he came to California. He had Tuesday night bluegrass jams back in the 70s at the tiny frame bungalow he shared with his then-GF. The other people in the little courtyard were pretty much all Hell's Angels.

 

My friend, Bill, and his GF were both in grad school by then and he was picking up a little extra cash as a "team teacher" in a large, popular folklore-mythology class. The bluegrass jams were great (and very free ranging) and they were a fixture for me in the mid-70s.

 

 

Bill was a nice guy with a spikey sense of humor and a dark side. He was skinny as a rail and had a long grayish blond beard that made him look a lot older than his thirty-some years.

 

His mother had been murdered when he was a little kid up in Montana, I think it was, and his dad, an itinerant musician had to come home, grab the first job he could find (undertaker's assistant), so he could raise his son (hence, it was that Bill apprenticed himself to the undertaker before later taking some community college classes and getting the higher education bug).

 

Bill was studying the physical side of anthropology (the undertaker connection) and, in the waning days of the 70s, when his GF-now-wife got a gig in Seattle (teaching college, I think), Bill went along.

 

What'll you do, Bill, we asked him?

 

Oh... I'll find something.

 

 

Flash forward to the late 80s.

 

One of our mutual friends had been living for a while in Seattle with Bill and his wife and moved back down to be closer to his aging mother after his father passed away. So we started hanging out a bit, reminiscing, and so on. I asked how Bill and his wife were doing... I'd completely lost touch.

 

Bill, he told me, was now the chief forensics investigator for King County (the county Seattle's in) and as such he was one of the key investigators on the Green River Serial Murder Task Force. (Ah... these serial murderers tend to run together, don't they? The Green River murderer eventually pled guilty to 48 murders but was believed to have committed more. The murderer laid low for a long time and avoided capture until 2001.)

 

While they didn't capture the murderer during Bill's tenure, his high profile on the case made him well known in the field of forensic anthropology. I heard he was doing contract work, freelancing as it were.

 

One day I followed a story on the slaughter in Yugoslavia back into the center of the LA Times and saw a 1/5 page photo of a guy standing, pointing down into a ditch. I recognized him almost immediately but I still was somewhat agog... it was, of course, my friend Bill.

 

The UN had ended up hiring him as a principal forensics investigator for their genocide/war crimes investigations in Rwanda and Srbenica and he became United Nations

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

And likewise I feel pretty much nailed by this post, except that you probably have your sh*t together a little or a lot more than I do...

 

 

Wow... I don't think you could have stated this more perfectly and you've also just described my own internal process. To put it bluntly, I'm somewhat capable of being an "uber person" in that I'm quite well rounded and competent in a lot of areas. But I never will be that type of person because I'm an artist first. I don't mean so much my work, but my temperament. Anytime I do something that seems too disciplined and linear and goal oriented, I find a way to screw it up.
:lol:
And it's not "self sabotage" although it would seem that way to an uber person - it's actually protecting myself because I am just miserable in those situations. I crave my reflection time - I just break down if I have a packed calendar for months on end. And I crave the mental space to be spontaneous - if everything I do is part of some goal or expectation placed on me, I cease being productive at all. I can be and often am really driven, but the drive originates in a place I can't necessarily control.


For the most part I've managed to structure my life so that it caters to my temperament - I can usually pick and choose when I work and what I do at any given time. And I could go a lot "farther" with everything I do, if I were more goal oriented. But I'm not. I didn't go into business for myself to make lots of money - I did it so I would have the time and flexibility I crave. I've got work out the wazoo and most people would think I'm nuts not to do it, but I often put it off, or turn it down. It doesn't make for great financial stability, but I manage. I don't really have a lot of choice, cuz I've tried and it always leads to disaster - if I had to behave like a type A person to survive, I'd shoot myself. Seriously, I can't imagine it.


There are a lot of uber people that I admire. Some of them seem unhappy and trying too hard to overcompensate for a basic self esteem problem, but some seem quite genuinely well adjusted too. I admire many of them and their contributions to society, but I don't envy them. I know I ain't like them and wasn't meant to be.
:)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

Do you know any? Are you one of them?

 

Yep... My girlfriend's younger brother - he graduated from Baylor law school back in May, passed the bar on his first try, is tall, skinny, athletic, good looking, teaches Sunday school to kids, etc... He works really hard at things, and all of his efforts pay off well... And... he's a really great guy.

 

:thu:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...