Members sventvkg Posted March 27, 2010 Members Share Posted March 27, 2010 Seriously though...39 years old and i'm finally taking the plunge..I feel very relaxed about it though so that's cool. We're doing the Vegas thing with a small group of friends and family. I moved to LA, got out of touring and playing music full time, started Film School and now i'm about to have a wife and 2 step sons...WOW! Talk about a Whole New Direction. I'm seriously stoked though. I've known this woman for 12 years and she is SALT OF THE EARTH, Non-materialistic, all about family and above all..Loves me to DEATH! How the hell did I get this lucky? Maybe because we're both 39 and neither of us has been married but have had our share of life experience. Anyway, I just felt compelled to share it with you all. Ciao! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rasputin1963 Posted March 27, 2010 Members Share Posted March 27, 2010 Men who marry live longer and enjoy better physical and mental health than those who don't. Men who marry get more sex than those who don't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr. Botch Posted March 27, 2010 Members Share Posted March 27, 2010 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FuqmEXRB48E&feature=PlayList&p=C89D9FF668107273&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=19 :poke: In all seriousness, congrats and good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members claveslave Posted March 27, 2010 Members Share Posted March 27, 2010 Get all of your tax returns done immediately and keep them up to date.Make a meticulous list of all your assets and liabilities and their respective values.Keep every piece of paper that has and ever will hit you in the face.Organize a pre-nup if you can.Good luck and enjoy it while you can or forever if you're lucky. Do not take this advice lightly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members djwayne Posted March 27, 2010 Members Share Posted March 27, 2010 Every time you leave the house, kiss your wife good-bye, and if you leave your wife, kiss your house good-bye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members UstadKhanAli Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Hey, you sound really happy, really stoked! I hope it continues for you! Although what claveslave is not terribly "romantic", it really does bear mentioning. I've seen a lot of guys get really screwed over, so doing what he suggests should not be taken lightly. I've never been married, but it's something I would strongly consider if/when I do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rasputin1963 Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 I read a recent book that analyzed what kind of marriages tend to stay together... all wishful thinking swept aside for the moment-- just sheer numbers were counted: years stayed together. I was shocked to read things like: Partners are ethnically very similar Partners are from the same country of origin Partners are not more than 10 years apart in age Partners come from similar financial/class strata of origin Partners have similar IQ's Partners have accrued similar education Partners vote identically Partners received similar, if not identical, religious denomination and instruction and, as banal as it may sound--- Propinquity is a big factor. ie., we tend to partner up with people who are near us physically (in the same office, neighborhood, university, etc.) How ugly these facts look today, don't they, in the era of political correctness? It seems that Love Is Blind, right? A stone can fall in love with a butterfly, right? A fish with a bicycle? A beggar with a princess? But hard science tells us otherwise. Your exceptions--- John & Yoko? Grace & Rainier? Rita Hayworth and the Aga Khan? --- prove the rule they do not shatter it. Each new generation of young people imagines that they will be the ones to disprove these hoary old wives' tales. I think about my own parents' marriage. It was hellacious, and they fought like cats and dogs for 22 years (in their era, divorce was still a big taboo no-no). I had an adolescence I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy. (Not complaining here, just telling the truth). In trying, over decades, to analyze their marriage, I eventually understood: Their marriage was not interracial or interfaith, inter-country, or May-December... It WAS, however, Inter-Class. My mother had come from great affluence and much high-society hoity-toitiness. My father came from rugged working-class white stock. Talk about a recipe for disaster. A marriage made in Hell Itself. Just their very assumptions about what "comfort" was or what "havingness" was or what "achievement" was, what "ambition" was, what "social propriety' was, what a child should have or not have... were so-o-o different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Beck Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 I'm getting Married Next Weekend! Any Words of Wisdom? Run away fast now while you can and don't look back! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sventvkg Posted March 28, 2010 Author Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Get all of your tax returns done immediately and keep them up to date. Make a meticulous list of all your assets and liabilities and their respective values. Keep every piece of paper that has and ever will hit you in the face. Organize a pre-nup if you can. Good luck and enjoy it while you can or forever if you're lucky. Do not take this advice lightly. no need. nothing to take Besides my instruments and she knows she would disappear before I gave them up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sventvkg Posted March 28, 2010 Author Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Hey, you sound really happy, really stoked! I hope it continues for you! Although what claveslave is not terribly "romantic", it really does bear mentioning. I've seen a lot of guys get really screwed over, so doing what he suggests should not be taken lightly. I've never been married, but it's something I would strongly consider if/when I do. I am happy thanks If I had any assets I would be doing this for sure but I've been a free spirited musician and kept it light till now. So anything we build together is both of ours, no matter what happens. I'm down with that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members flemtone Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 You can never say 'I love you' too many times. Although it may seem that it's implied in your words and actions, it'll make your Sweetie's day every single time. Congratulations! I hope you two will be as happy as my wife and I have been for 31 years. Mazeltov! *breaks glass* :phil: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members deanmass Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 You do realize that the term 'ours' means "Hers as well"? Seriously...Best wishes to you and your fiance'.... Marriage is probably the most challenging, but also the most rewarding. I am divorced and think of it as my biggest failure in life, but, I have 2 great kids from it, and had I (we) followed the next line, things may have worked out.. Be honest and don't take each other for granted Lord loves a workin' man, and don't never ever trust whitely... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gus Lozada Posted March 28, 2010 Share Posted March 28, 2010 I'm getting Married Next Weekend! Any Words of Wisdom? DO NOT DO IT. Seriously. ... or more seriously, my life got happier since I got divorced. I guess getting married is a first step towards true happiness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members offramp Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Men who marry live longer and enjoy better physical and mental health than those who don't. Men who marry get more sex than those who don't. Sorry, I call bull{censored}. Married 5 out of 7 years. It almost killed me.And I waited until I was 39, too. Never again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Rudolf von Hagenwil Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Don't worry. Andrew Lloyd Webber is also married, and he still composes musicals (a British genre of ultra light opera) almost everyday, and Dar Re Mi, the horse of Andrew's wife Madeleine won the Sheema Classic race of the Dubai today Saturday March 27. at the World Cup at the Meydan horse race track in Dubai, United Arab Emirates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members claveslave Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Maybe, at 39 a piece, you are both well grounded. I hope so. However, beware what begins with her 46th birthday. 45's OK but 46!!! That's when the downhill slide to 50 begins and the changes after that are exponential. Seriously. Sorry to be the cynic. Even more seriously, I hope you both are eternally happy. I admire and envy seeing 75 year olds still walking hand in hand down the promenade. Ain't love grand! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members UstadKhanAli Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 I am happy thanks If I had any assets I would be doing this for sure but I've been a free spirited musician and kept it light till now. So anything we build together is both of ours, no matter what happens. I'm down with that. That's just part of it, though. A prenup would protect you against anything that you would eventually acquire or a business you would start or guitars you would purchase or any of that. Regardless, you sound super happy and I hope that continues!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members amplayer Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Don't forget that the wedding itself is HER DAY. You just have to be careful not to mess anything up. As for the marriage, it sounds like you're all ready and don't really need any advice. I can say from experience that a good marriage gets better as the years go on. Look forward to it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members rasputin1963 Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Maybe, at 39 a piece, you are both well grounded. I hope so. However, beware what begins with her 46th birthday. Men On Pause? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sventvkg Posted March 28, 2010 Author Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 DO NOT DO IT. Seriously. ... or more seriously, my life got happier since I got divorced. I guess getting married is a first step towards true happiness. Yea man, it's a toss up and I realize that. You make the best choices you can at the time and go for it. I've never really been afraid of shit, so I just go for it!! I'm not worried a out failing. If I do, I just get back up and drive on!!! Gus, seriously man, i'm glad you are happy now. Marriage CERTAINLY isn't for everyone! Wasn't for me all these years..Until now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sventvkg Posted March 28, 2010 Author Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Maybe, at 39 a piece, you are both well grounded. I hope so. However, beware what begins with her 46th birthday. 45's OK but 46!!! That's when the downhill slide to 50 begins and the changes after that are exponential. Seriously. Sorry to be the cynic.Even more seriously, I hope you both are eternally happy. I admire and envy seeing 75 year olds still walking hand in hand down the promenade.Ain't love grand! What changes? You mean like Menopause and the like? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members claveslave Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Menopause can be treated. The fear of loss of "pull power" and what "otherwise might have been" don't have a prescription, yet. Just don't get complacent. And I mean not to get personal but the urge for sex grows stronger in women over time. Make sure that bonding element doesn't diminish from your side of the bed. Of course, it takes two but talk about it in an open way, if it does start to wane, in order to keep the flame burning. Men can get so consumed by the need to provide and succeed and the insecurity of such is more prevalent in professions that are of a hap hazard nature, like being a musician, that the old "roll in the hay" can begin to fall by the wayside. Avoid at all costs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members the stranger Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 Congrats! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members VanHalen Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 I'm getting Married Next Weekend! Any Words of Wisdom? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members elsongs Posted March 28, 2010 Members Share Posted March 28, 2010 My three greatest fears in the world: 1) Divorce2) Marriage3) Getting stung by bees Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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