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That Wasn't Smart


rickidoo

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A couple of years ago I had a song called That Wasn't Smart. It had a heavy beat and a somewhat driving bass. I decided to "country-tize" it. Some of the lyrics have changed, but the core of the lyrics are still the same, wrapped in a bouncy country git envelop.

 

This one is suppose to have humorous lyrics from a sort of "why do these things always happen to me?" standpoint.

 

Any/all comments/suggestions/criticisms appreciated.

 

That Wasn't Smart

© 2013 Lyrics Rick Dieffenbach © 2015 Music Rick Dieffenbach

 

alternatively, mp3 download link

 

Spoken: You ever feel that no matter what you do in your life you seem to make things worse.

 

V1: Last night I said something bad

It made my girlfriend very sad

And when it was time to go to bed

she said I hope you enjoy the couch instead

 

CHORUS:

That wasn't smart (that wasn’t smart…)

What I said wasn't smart (No that wasn't smart)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By casting little follies on me

 

V2: Today, I went to work

The boss mas was, a total jerk

When I told him to go to hell

He said pack your things, I wish you well

 

CHORUS:

that wasn't smart (that wasn’t smart…)

What I said wasn't smart (no that wasn’t smart…)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By casting little follies on me

 

===============================

 

BRIDGE: <<<< replaced Jan 12

should I stop blaming

the devil for his 'makin

My life a series of ups then downs

 

or can I choose a better way?

Yea I can make better choices today

Gonna turn this unlucky life around

 

=============================

 

V3: Driving home, stopped for a beer

2 hours later, my head unclear

The trooper man, said how do you do

Please blow in this little tube

 

CHORUS:

That wasn't smart (that wasn’t smart…)

What I did wasn't smart (no it wasn't smart)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By playing little follies on me

 

Yea the devil gets his jollies

By playing little follies on me

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It doesn't sound particularly 'Country' to me, but what would I know - I'm not A Merry Can.

It's the sort of ditty you might hear in a variety show in this neck of the woods.

 

I was expecting to hear drums and bass enter at V2 but you've kept it as a 1+1.

Alternating root to 5th does not necessarily a country song make.

Any thoughts about countryfying it with some bluegrass flavours or whatever…………?

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Delmont - thanks - 'appreciate the feedback.

 

'Git - It's just for fun anyways. I left it 1+1 because I want to enter it into the muse contest that is limited to 1+1. Maybe play it open mike too.

 

The bridge has been rewritten lyric wise:

 

Spoken: You ever feel that no matter what you do in your life you seem to make things worse.

 

V1: Last night I said something bad

It made my girlfriend very sad

And when it was time to go to bed

she said I hope you enjoy the couch instead

 

CHORUS:

That wasn't smart (that wasn’t smart…)

What I said wasn't smart (No that wasn't smart)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By casting little follies on me

 

V2: Today, I went to work

The boss man was, a total jerk

When I told him to go to hell

He said pack your things, I wish you well

 

CHORUS:

that wasn't smart (that wasn’t smart…)

What I said wasn't smart (no that wasn’t smart…)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By casting little follies on me

 

===============================

 

BRIDGE:

should I stop blaming

the devil for his 'makin

My life a series of ups then downs

 

or can I choose a better way?

Yea I can make better choices today

Gonna turn this unlucky life around

 

=============================

 

V3: Driving home, stopped for a beer

2 hours later, my head unclear

The trooper man, said how do you do

Please blow in this little tube

 

CHORUS:

That wasn't smart (that wasn’t smart…)

What I did wasn't smart (no it wasn't smart)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By playing little follies on me

 

Yea the devil gets his jollies

By playing little follies on me

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Chorus (double length, turnaround on the second repetition):

 

Well that was dumb (yeah it wasn't smart)

Should not have done (yeah it wasn't smart)

It wasn't smart (yeah it wasn't smart)

It wasn't smart (yeah it wasn't smart)

 

Well that was dumb (yeah it wasn't smart)

Should not have done (yeah it wasn't smart)

’Cause the devil gets his jollies

By playing little follies on me

 

 

The verses need more space/distance/contrast between what the protagonist thinks he is doing and how it is perceived/turns out/becomes not smart. That's where the laughs are.

 

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It doesn't sound particularly 'Country' to me, but what would I know - I'm not A Merry Can.

It's the sort of ditty you might hear in a variety show in this neck of the woods.

 

Yep, it can work in a lot of styles. Country is definitely one of them, if that's how he decides to treat it. Music hall is another strong contender.

 

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