Members bee3 Posted October 23, 2012 Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 I started strumming this the other night... did a quick recording so I didn't lose it. Had some gibberish words... now I'm trying to refine. Live! Right here in this thread! Updated demo: http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=11977040Certain Company Sometimes I'm good in certain company Other times I sit awkwardly... alone Well it may be due to circumstance That I prefer to take a chance... alone Sometimes I feel like letting go Turn off the lights, turn on the stereo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Oswlek Posted October 23, 2012 Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 This is totally me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 23, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 It's a few of us actually. Feel free to contribute to vs 2. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Oswlek Posted October 23, 2012 Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 I'm not much for writing lyrics without melody. Can you upload the idea? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 23, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 Unfortunately... not at the moment. It's at home on my computer. It kind of goes Da-da-daaaa-da-daa-da. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted October 23, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 23, 2012 Originally Posted by bee3 Unfortunately... not at the moment. It's at home on my computer. It kind of goes Da-da-daaaa-da-daa-da. That sounds a lot like The Final Countdown. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted October 23, 2012 Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 Originally Posted by bee3 Unfortunately... not at the moment. It's at home on my computer. It kind of goes Da-da-daaaa-da-daa-da. Now wait just a minute! That's plagiarized! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 23, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 Well you know I'm good in certain company Most other times I sit awkwardly... alone It may be due to circumstance That I prefer to take a chance... alone Sometimes I feel like just letting go Turn off the lights, turn on the stereoSometimes I Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted October 23, 2012 Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 Really good ideas so far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 23, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 Originally Posted by LCK Really good ideas so far. Do I get bonus points for using the word 'reciprocity' in a pop song? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted October 23, 2012 Members Share Posted October 23, 2012 Originally Posted by bee3 Do I get bonus points for using the word 'reciprocity' in a pop song? Yes, plus envy points for using it before I could.I actually wrote the word down the other night as a possible song title! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 24, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Here's a short vid demo of what I have so far... some of the phrasing is a bit off, I know. Sometimes I'm good in certain company Other times I sit awkwardly... alone It may be due to circumstance That I prefer to take a chance... alone Sometimes I feel like letting go Turn out the lights, turn on the stereo Sometimes I'm into reciprocity Avoiding all animosity... I know It's a perfect plan 'cause it works for me And in my head where no one else can see... I'm prone Sometimes I feel like letting go Turn out the lights, turn on the stereo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members oldgitplayer Posted October 24, 2012 Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 You're a clever lad but.........I made an immediate association.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5k3JVfxluFU Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 24, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by oldgitplayer You're a clever lad but.........I made an immediate association. Hmmm... maybe a bit. Enough to kill what I'm doing with it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members oldgitplayer Posted October 24, 2012 Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by bee3 Hmmm... maybe a bit. Enough to kill what I'm doing with it? No - keep going. I just wanted to flag the Logical Song so that you didn't sub-consciously drift too close to the rocks.Reinforce the differences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members oldgitplayer Posted October 24, 2012 Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 BTW - I like the lyric as it is - It's perfectly in sync with the person we know as bee3. I like songs covering the good things about being alone Lennon did 'There's a Place' Wilson did 'In my Room' I've recently got part way with 'That's when lonely's not so bad'. Or if I do it 'Country' it might become, 'Maybe lonely 'aint that bad'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted October 24, 2012 Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Just perfect. I'll just add two more points. 1) I was working in radio when "The Logical Song" was popular, so I heard it thousands of times. I didn't see or hear any relation b/w that and this song. 2) Your wordsmithery has improved by huge leaps and bounds! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 24, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by LCK Just perfect.I'll just add two more points.2) Your wordsmithery has improved by huge leaps and bounds! Thanks... that means a lot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LeonardScaper Posted October 24, 2012 Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by LCK Your wordsmithery has improved by huge leaps and bounds! And you really sound good as well.I did have just a small stumble over....And in my head where no one else can seeIt just seemed a bit.....too easy and patent, especially after the excellent delivery of the reciprocity/animosity lines.Maybe something like....In my mind where I know I'm free. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 24, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by LeonardScaper And you really sound good as well.I did have just a small stumble over....And in my head where no one else can seeIt just seemed a bit.....too easy and patent, especially after the excellent delivery of the reciprocity/animosity lines.Maybe something like....In my mind where I know I'm free. Sure... i'll take a look at that line. Thanks. Still need a third verse... probably some sort of instrumental bridge. And a proper recording. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted October 24, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by oldgitplayer You're a clever lad but.........I made an immediate association. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5k3JVfxluFU Originally Posted by bee3 Hmmm... maybe a bit. Enough to kill what I'm doing with it? Originally Posted by oldgitplayer No - keep going. I just wanted to flag the Logical Song so that you didn't sub-consciously drift too close to the rocks.Reinforce the differences. Originally Posted by LCK Just perfect.I'll just add two more points.1) I was working in radio when "The Logical Song" was popular, so I heard it thousands of times. I didn't see or hear any relation b/w that and this song. 2) Your wordsmithery has improved by huge leaps and bounds! I LOVE THIS!!!! I did make the connection to the Logical Song as well though. On the bolded words below. It hit me as I listened and before I read any of this^.Well you know I'm good in certain companyOther times I sit awkwardly... aloneSometimes I'm into reciprocityAvoiding all animosity... I knowIt brings to mind: happily, joyfully, playfully, watching me.But your song is AWESOME!!! So, you may or may not have to change it. I guess it depends on how you feel about that. But if you were to, it would be as easy as changing one note. Logical goes 3 2 1. Scale steps. From the 3rd down to the tonic. You could go... 3 4 3. Just move up the back down, creating a little toggle of a hook as opposed to the down-the-steps hook Supertramp uses.Either way you go... I really love this song. On a bit of a roll are we? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members bee3 Posted October 24, 2012 Author Members Share Posted October 24, 2012 Originally Posted by Lee Knight I LOVE THIS!!!! I did make the connection to the Logical Song as well though. On the bolded words below. It hit me as I listened and before I read any of this^.Well you know I'm good in certain companyOther times I sit awkwardly... aloneSometimes I'm into reciprocityAvoiding all animosity... I knowIt brings to mind: happily, joyfully, playfully, watching me.But your song is AWESOME!!! So, you may or may not have to change it. I guess it depends on how you feel about that. But if you were to, it would be as easy as changing one note. Logical goes 3 2 1. Scale steps. From the 3rd down to the tonic. You could go... 3 4 3. Just move up the back down, creating a little toggle of a hook as opposed to the down-the-steps hook Supertramp uses.Either way you go... I really love this song. On a bit of a roll are we? I'll give it a think... it honestly doesn't bother me that much, although I will admit to reading Ken Scott's book at the moment and there is a whole section on the recording of Supertramp's Crime of the Century (but Logical wasn't on that album). Maybe I'll throw a few 3 4 3s in there for variation.Glad you like it... anyone want to write the third verse? I so hate writing lyrics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted October 24, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 24, 2012 Sometimes I can't seem to give a damn But can't find a better plan... does it show? It's not that I don't care what you think of me Actually on the contrary... you know Sometimes I feel like letting go Turn out the lights, turn on the stereo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted October 24, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 24, 2012 Sometimes I feel like a withered man Beaten up and also ran... I do And though it might take a little while I'll try and force a smile... for you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted October 24, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 24, 2012 This always feels like a pointless dance But I buckle up and take a chance... I try If you ask me how I got this way I'm not sure what I'd have to say... or why Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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