Members AmirMaor Posted January 18, 2014 Members Share Posted January 18, 2014 Hi, My name is Amir from Tel-Aviv and I LOVE music! I'm here to here your opinion about my music (good and bad) and hope to learn from it. Here is my new song (and clip). hope you like it Lyrics: All she said you and me All she said meant to be All she gave me reason to bealive When she said she will never live Where are you now What are you doing to me Where are you now All she said hold me tiet When we stay up all night All she said trust in me All I have Is what she said to me Where are you now What are you doing to me Where are you now The wind you feel I feel it to The sky you see Is not just for you We are on the same road Don't turn your head away Maybe some day.... Where are you now What are you doing to me Where are you now the song: Tnx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Oswlek Posted January 18, 2014 Members Share Posted January 18, 2014 Great! I'll let others discuss the lyric, but melodically it worked great for me. You have as much to teach as you have to learn. There were only two spots that sounded like they might warrant rethinking. 1:58 - I LOVE the chord that comes in here, but I'm not crazy about the chosen vocal melody. Can't explain why or what I would do differently, but it doesn't hit home for me. 2:24 - The guitar slide up is outstanding.... so good in fact that I am really disappointed when the vocals reappear so suddenly. My ear is pining for a guitar solo there instead of just going back to the chorus. Great stuff, Amir! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members LCK Posted January 18, 2014 Members Share Posted January 18, 2014 AmirMaor wrote: Hi, My name is Amir from Tel-Aviv and I LOVE music! I'm here to here your opinion about my music (good and bad) and hope to learn from it. Here is my new song (and clip). hope you like it Lyrics: All she said you and me All she said meant to be All she gave me reason to bealive When she said she will never live Where are you now What are you doing to me Where are you now All she said hold me tiet When we stay up all night All she said trust in me All I have Is what she said to me Where are you now What are you doing to me Where are you now The wind you feel I feel it to The sky you see Is not just for you We are on the same road Don't turn your head away Maybe some day.... Where are you now What are you doing to me Where are you now the song: Tnx I enjoyed the tune very much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members oldgitplayer Posted January 19, 2014 Members Share Posted January 19, 2014 I certainly enjoyed listening to this, so I join the others in saying so. Good musically.Lyrically - it suffers a little from English not being your 1st language. But don't take that too badly - most of our songs need some extra work even when English is our home language.There are 2 areas where the song could benefit from some additional work:1. There are a few spots where the English isn't quite right, but I understand what you mean.2. Sometimes your vocal phrasing isn't quite right - the emphasis would be better placed on a different word in the sentence.Do you write any songs in your own language? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Lee Knight Posted January 19, 2014 Moderators Share Posted January 19, 2014 I love the overall vibe and dig the guitar fills. It is, for me, a very cool blend of American Rock with a very unique and hip melodic sense. You need, and we need, to workshop a work in progress here with us. Nice. Ditto what all was said by previous posters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AmirMaor Posted January 19, 2014 Author Members Share Posted January 19, 2014 Thank you all for the honest comments. About my voice, I know I have a little accent, but in some way Ithuth (I hope) it will sound special and not another amarican voice (forgive me for the comper, but like "Schwarzenegger" with his wird accent...it do some filling else). I do have some music in hebrew but some how this one looks and work much better for me (with the accent), again, I think becuse it's more special from just another midium voice in hebrew... *people like story, something different, no? Tnx again for the comment, i'll take them siriusly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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